Nonsense from the mind

just really random stuff.

Its raining outside and I am sitting 

here in my small cubicle.

The drops of rain run down the window

I have behind me.

The sky is grey and full of many clouds

and my daughter is at home with a cough.

I do not mind sitting here, really I do not

but at times I want to run.

The cars in the parking lot are being washed

of all dust and grime and getting 

clean for free.

And I am sitting here wondering how in the 

world will I get home today.

For you see I am without a car and have been since 2013.

So my moving around is very limited to my aging father, taxi man

and any helpful soul that does not mind giving me a ride

home.

I must be dialing and or fetching leads, yet there are not many and too many

people here.

So I get disheartened and want to just get up and leave.

Yet than I remember that I am not alone.

So I must find renewed motivation within me

and do my best to finish my shift.

Rain has stopped but sky still grey and cloudy.

Tis the rainy season we are in right now

and it bugs my allergies.

I get that we have to learn to work and 

make a living for ourselves yet how come

all that schooling never said how tough it be

once we got out.

This is so repetitive and I feel that I could be 

doing so much more and I want to do 

more than just sit here in front of this computer.

Is there more out there than this life I have come to know.

Could be I am unsure.

So my mind feels a bit muddle today and my mood

is quiet and retracted.  I want to be sleeping in my bed.

But alas here I am since 6am in the morning.

I hate feeling this way I do, yet many others

are at home resting and sleeping in and getting time to spend 

with their families.

Of course home no longer means the same to me

since my mom no longer is here. Yet my daughter

whom I love to death still lives at home and needs me still

or so she says and I must do my best to give 

her the chance I never had to make a bigger imprint 

within this world.

And so for now I have no care for punctuation marks or grammatical rules.

So pardon if this seems to run without a pace cause I really 

have no care.

The ceiling above my head matches the sky outside. Grey and dull and I hate 

the air conditioner since it bugs my allergies.

The computer is black and keyboard too as is the mouse.  My desk is white with a blue pastel color on the sides...

My chair is a lime green and the worst chair ever as my back and butt hurt so much

I really just want to be outside in the rain and have no care in the world

but I cannot do this yet.

So here I come to put my random thoughts down on this screen for all to see

and for all to read.

My mind is a machine that never stops processing.  I feel as if I am losing 

my humanity as words come through and all I do is keep on typing 

as they come.

So I wish you all a good afternoon or evening depending on where you are

within this world that is groaning in pain as we lay waste to all of nature.

And I will see if I am able to find that which I am needing at this time

to finish my work and make it through the rest of my shift and not 

feel so gloom.

Reviews

[Coyote Poetry]

Honest and real thoughts.
"So I get disheartened and want to just get up and leave.
Yet than I remember that I am not alone.
So I must find renewed motivation within me
and do my best to finish my shift."
I understand the above lines. I dislike my work but I need money. I like the description in the poem. Dear Maria. You made the reader feel your thoughts and want to escape.
Coyote

[Maria]

Thank you Mr. Coyote, I truly appreciate your input always. Good day to you. ;)

[Coyote Poetry]

You are welcome Maria.

[Maria]

Thank you again.

[Psychotic Lily]

I love how this was written with raw emotions and such honesty. It really struck home when the narrator kept asking if there was more to life than living a repetitive daily routine.

The line that saddened me and touched my heart was "I must do my best to give
her the chance I never had to make a bigger imprint within this world."

The feeling of wanting someone to have a better life than the one you are living makes my heart melt.

[Maria]

Humbled once again, and I thank you for your review and words. I am touched by your review.

[Chris]

you touch OUR reality in a thought-full way.

[Maria]

It seems so. But thanks for reading. And for your review

[apennylate]

Thank you, the words of the mind, like a machine on repeat... Tragic boredom and... Well... Allergies are the worst, hah, was an interesting read, perhaps the next day shall not be so full of room temperature gloom... Gloomily penned...

[Maria]

Haha, loved your review Silente. Been out a week, from work, from sinus and rhinitis farangitis that led to Acute Bronchitis...ugh...still on road of recovery but can talk now at least. Thanks for the review,.

[Toxic Angel]

I like the way this is something we all feel, very down to earth, the rutine of everyday life, its well written and expressed, keep it up!

[Maria]

Thank you Toxic, very true, I was just bored out of my mind.

[Hope]

I love reading random thoughts,
easy to process and relatable.
Great work Maria:)

[HarleyCola]

You're writing speaks to me, I am currently going through similar feelings about my job. I understand that endless struggle of just wanting to stop but knowing that you can't because you have so many other responsibilities and obligations . I hope that you can find a few moments of peace amidst this struggle we call life.

[rowan.taylorrr]

i really like the reality and realbess of this. i really enjoy the part about sometimes just wanting to leave because i think we all relate to that. well done

[Maria]

You are so right and thanks again.

[Priyanshi]

I loved your poem, friend....You write so well and it felt that true emotions penned here...Keep on writing.

[Maria]

Thank you.

[Priyanshi]

My pleasure.

[Ellie Qtz]

I'll be praying for your daughter and your allergies!

[Maria]

Thank you that would be greatly appreciated. She and I are prone to bronchitis, asthma, and pneumonia,,,and right now she is developing a throat infection but we caught it on time and my dad got her the meds the doctor recommended.

[Ellie Qtz]

I hope God will find a solution to this nasty problem

[Maria]

Thanks and am trusting.

[Ellie Qtz]

I'll be praying for your daughter and your allergies!