The Pond

I grew up in a middle class area in the state of Virginia and there was a pond at the end of our neighborhood, and during Spring and Summer and even the fall, families would gather together.

Oh how I loved the feel, of the wind, as 

we would race down the road,

towards the Pond.

Such joy and bliss, filled with innocence,

as all the children, would gather

at the pond.

Whatever woes or pain, we had, would

be thrust aside, as we would approach,

that pond.

And how we giggled, and laughed,

running around, with no nagging parents,

about or yelling. 

During summer days, we would all race 

down, that single road, and dare to 

see who would want to be, the one 

to jump into that pond.

The leaves were green and plenty of grass, 

as well as toads, and snakes, perhaps rats?

We did not mind, for all we could see,

was a world as wide as our imaginations

could be.

A pirate here, an adventurer over there, and a botanical scientist here, and perhaps a vet, as well.

We had no care, no worries, let our shoes get muddy, as we

tried to capture gold fish and tad poles!

Oh those days, in which, nothing could hold us back,

as we all would race, down towards our pond.

Such memories, we left in that place. maybe a few full of tears but still, remains, that pond in that place,

where no one would know,

how much fun, us kids, had in that place.

Reviews

[Namyh]

Maria - Poets often come with their own set of keys which unlock memories forgotten with time. You did good opening the door and letting out one of mine that I did forget. Thanks for the resurrection of a wonderful moment of youth gone by. Think I'll ponder on it for a while and smile. Namyh

[Maria]

Thank you for your review and I am happy to have done so.

[Ty]

Enjoying this as a VA native. Reminiscing, well put together!

[Maria]

Thanks. I grew up in Fairfax Virginia. Have many memories from there and surrounding counties.

[Writer at last! Sky ~]

The pond, the green font, the life in nature, the childhood and lastly the memories with tears. Everything seems to be perfect and beautiful in this prose. Some memeories really last long! Cheers for them 🍸

[Maria]

Thank you Sky. Glad you enjoyed.

[Writer at last! Sky ~]

Welcome Maria! Yes I enjoyed it...

[Maria]

Good to hear Sky. ☺

[William Liston]

Hello Maria :)
This is a beautiful piece that takes the reader down memory lane. I like the overall simplicity and elegance of this piece in that it creates a calm atmosphere and sounds relatable and realistic at the same time. I also enjoyed the nuances of imagination, innocence, and curisosity throughout and how they showed the playfulness of children. The visual presentation was also nice.
If I may critique, I felt like commas were over-used. I felt like they created unnecessary pauses at some instances. For example, here's how I read the first line:

"Oh how I loved the feel [PAUSE] of the wind"

Usually, such a statement would be read without a pause, so I found the comma distracting.

Grammatically, commas should only be used in few instances:
- before the following words: for, and, nor, but, or, yet, so
- when items are listed in a series, ex: We bought *eggs, milk, and crackers.*
- before introductory phrases: *This morning,* we ran outside
- all other uses are at the author's discretion depending on how he/she wants something to be read

If you need any help with comma usage, just let me know and I'll gladly help.

Happy writing!

- William Liston

[Maria]

Thank you for that reminder. Much appreciated. I kept going back and forth trying to figure out what to change or not. So thank you.

[Coyote Poetry]

A beautiful poem and memory shared. I love Virginia. My dad lived in Pennington Gap. I loved the mountains. Your good description took me with and I enjoyed the journey. Thank you Maria for sharing the amazing poetry.
Coyote

[Maria]

Thank you, and yes indeed, Virginia is a great place. Glad you enjoyed it. Thank you for your continued encouragement as well.

[Coyote Poetry]

Was my pleasure and you are welcome.