Romeo and Juliet: The Twisted Version Prologue

I attempted to remake a classic, but there is nothing better than ol' Romeo and Juliet.

We watched as his body fell to the floor, his silk and fur robe tainted with his own blood. Celestine spun and grabbed my hand, our eye's meeting. 

"Now. Now we shall run away!" She said as she spun me gently, then bending me backwards over her silk adorned arm. I giggle as she pulls me back upright. 

"I suppose Romeo had gotten far too close to our little secret, hm?" I say as I glance around. Surely no one would be here. They were to leave Romeo in sorrow over Juliet's death. Oh but, I was supposed to be dead, wasn't I? Well, I am here. With the love of my life, now free to escape these chains of my old life. So where to begin with these surprising turn of events?

Author's Note

I hope you enjoy the prologue for my story that I am working on! I am trying my best not to ruin the classic LOL. Well much love to you and have a splendid day!

Reviews

[barleygirl]

I'm not clear what's going on here. I"m unclear how many people are in this segment. Is there Celestine & the unnamed narrator, as well as referencing Romeo & Juliet? It could be that the narrator IS Juliet. It's not clear. But I get the idea that there might be a lesbian connection that's able to flourish now that Romeo is out of the way. I think you rush thru your writing too quickly without putting in enuf details to help us see what's going on. We can't see if your characters are male or female. It might be helpful if you used more physical description so we can see and feel and hear & smell these characters. Slow down & spend some time with your characters. If you don't spend time with them, why should we? It takes time to make your readers love your characters. Readers have to love characters to want to follow them & see what happens. You brush over things too quickly & we have not made any connections to your characters yet. But I love the idea of a Romeo & Juliet remake. It is much needed! (((HUGS))) Fondly, Margie

[Rose]

Alright! I will definetly try to work on that! My most sincere apologies! Thank you for your feedback, which I am sure will help me improve tons! Much love to youuuu! ❤️

[Delmar Cooper]

Greenwich Village. Rent first and give the place a chance.

[Einstein Noodle]

i think the prologue is a fine hook. you have your work cut out for you but already the story has embarked on a completely new path .. so have at it says i .. will you bounce back in time as the two lovers move forward? i'd love to know how that played out as well as where they head into the future .. strong start says i!
E.

[Rose]

Thank you oh so very much! I am writing furiously to get it done as efficiently and as quickly as possible! Haha thank you so much and have a day as splendid as yourself! ❤️

[AJNJ]

Well they could run away and take a boat to Hawaii. Or fly off to some such exotic location for vacation. This is very original Rose. Enjoyed!

[Rose]

Thank youuu so very much! That is true! Maybe they can go to Japan or something? Chill on the beaches of Hawaii! Haha much love to you! ❤️

[AJNJ]

Hahaha Sounds good to me. Book that jet.

[Patricia Wedel]

Hi Rose... I suppose you have seen the Movie
"Shakespeare in Love"... with Gwyneth Paltrow...
Your muse will most likely have a very Artsy touch.
Thanks for your lovely review. The best of wishes
for a Holiday full of enchantment. gently, Pat

[Rose]

Haha I loved Shakespeare in Love! I watched it a while ago but some of those funny and or key moments will definitely be hinted to in the story! Thank you so much and have a day as splendid as yourself! ❤️

[Vertigo Cat1111]

You could never ruin the classic, haha! I really love this, and the writing and idea are amazing! I love it when the 'weird' couples cause chaos together! Who wants a perfect, sweet, little love? The crazier the better, and you describe that perfectly here... I love this idea and want it as a movie now pleeeeease, I'm beggggging ):

[Rose]

Right! The crazier is definitely better!🤪 Thank you so, so, soooo very much! I hope you have a day as splendid as yourself!❤️

[Vertigo Cat1111]

Thank you so much, and you too!

[jacob erin-cilberto]

"Oh happy dagger, this is thy sheath..." Oh wait...she doesn't die in this version...
Traitor Juliet runs off with Celestine...well, at least it isn't Count Paris. He was a dolt.

[Rose]

HAHA true that! A dolt is to put it lightly! I hope you have a day as splendid as yourself! ❤️