-untitled- (3)

third part of the story... still to be finished...

Murmurs and soft whispers bring me back to reality. I keep my eyes shut taking in all the voices surrounding me.  

“Mumsy, is mammaw going to be ok?”
-
“Of course she is going to be ok dork! Don’t you think mom would have taken her to the hospital already if she thought it were something bad?”
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“Sshh!! Izzy be nice to your brother.

Silence. I don’t move a muscle, laying, taking it all in. I take a deep breath and turn to the side.

“Ok, let’s leave mom to rest, If you two want to stay you will have to be very quiet.”
-
“Yes mommy.”

I move faintly and open my eyes barely but everything is blurry and my head is spinning so I close them again. She whispers…

                “Baby I’m going to finish dinner, ok?”
                -
                “Mmhhm”

With that, I close my eyes shut. I can hear them whispering something I can’t understand and the voices fade away slowly as I fall into a deep sleep.

 

 

 

I wake up and there they are. She is laying across the bed holding my hand and the kids are sleeping under our arms. Her head rests on my belly and his on my legs. I lay there quietly admiring them. She has her eyebrows and he has her nose, they look so peaceful. Slowly I sneak out of the bed and walk around the bedroom taking it all in. Pictures, paintings, flowers, opening drawers, touching fabrics, sniffing perfumes…

I walk to the bathroom and start filling the tub. I find some candles under the sink and place them around lighting up one by one. I take a bath for what it feels like hours and I put on a robe walking around the house, exploring bedrooms, looking at albums, discovering my life. The kids, our kids, they are Izzy and Charlie. We had them 9 years ago this December. She loves purple (it’s all over her room), reads a lot of books and is as girly as… this new me, apparently. He has the most boyish green bedroom ever, messy of course, filled with football jerseys, soccer balls, I even found a golf club under his bed (I cleaned it obviously).

Walk down the stairs across the hall heading to the kitchen, I need coffee, I stop at the door to catch my breath. Black wood cabinets, silver pulls, top of the line appliances, a beautiful steel blacksplash behind the spotless 6 burner stove, anything a dream kitchen would be. I find my way around the spices and cereals finding the coffee, vanilla coffee, my favorite. I pour me a cup and continue exploring. The house is a mix of scents, there are flowers everywhere (I notice they are all peonies but don’t put much thought into it), pictures and paintings on all the walls I get to the living room, I sit on the sofa and I find myself staring at a corner of the room until I stand up and walk towards it. What I find is just as surreal as this house, there is a door on the wall, it has been painted so it can’t really be seen but it’s there. I push on a corner, like I know what I am doing, and it opens revealing an office. High shelves filled with books, a window sit hidden behind white lace curtains and a corner desk in the middle of the room holding a computer, picture frames and, again, peonies. I go in, sit on the desk and there she is, looking at me, smiling. It’s our wedding day and she looks radiant. The computer is open and I decide to look in it, I think it’s mine, looking around at the books and pictures. The desktop picture of the kids welcome me into a box of unknown memories as I start going through the files. Personal Files>Isabel>Wedding and there it is, a video.