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That constant contemplation of actually waking one day to the life of happiness and dreams is increasingly dreadful. Every second of the thought puts another bullet in my head. There's no paradise, no happiness; it's all an illusion, we're all delusional and thriving for the "inevitable", waiting for it to come. But, the truth of life is that life is suffering. With what brings happiness brings pain and misery. I'm no longer waiting around for this state of paradise everyone speaks of achieving. 

"Where are you going?" Joe asks me, nearly spitting his drink out to bring the question to my ears before i escape him. 

"Paradise." I exclaimed, walking away from the bar. 

"Well bring me with!?" He joked with a barking laughter. 

See, even he damn right knows there's no such thing. The people that are delusional to the dream of happiness are the trapped ones. They follow the obligations of life to achieve happiness, and when they fulfill their duties, they wait for it patiently. Years go by and they still wait when all they have to do is step outside and realize there is no paradise, but they're an obdurate soul because they worked too hard to take their life as a waste. The sad thing is that people go their whole lives waiting and slaving away, focusing on that point, when they could turn their heads and see the bridge to life. Luckily, at age 22, I saw the bridge in the corner of my eye and took my chances and hopped on the bus to live. This journey was the essence of my life and no one could ever duplicate it; for i took the path no one risked to ride.