Before Midnight

A twist on the classic Cinderella story!

"Use this cleanser
Get it cleaner
Move even faster
Or I'll get meaner!"

I rolled my eyes
As she walked out
My crazy step-mother
Made me want to shout.

My mind was racing
As I scrubbed the rug
Couldn't she ask nicely?
Even give a big hug?

She stormed back in
Shoved my nose to the floor
I had had quite enough
So I slowly locked the door.

Removing my slipper
I smashed her ugly face
Glass shattered everywhere
Would a lawyer take my case?

I dragged her to the patch
Where pumpkins stood galore
She was now gone forever
Would be my boss no more.

Only one more job to do
That was to clean the stain
It came from the grey matter
Masquerading as her brain.

Don't mess with Cinderella!
My lungs had filled with hate
I have a ball to attend
And I shan't be late!!

 

Author's Note

Please give an overall review on this funny poem. Thank you!

Reviews

[Celie Rose]

Loved your version of a Cinderella story..Hate to say it but, Mean old step-mom got what she deserved. I imagined as I read the abuse Cinderella endured and how I'd feel. Not sure I'd have gone that far for fear of the consequences. However I do feel a sense of justification. Well expressed and written.

[MelissaAndres]

Thank you, Celie Rose! I guess you could say I have a 'bad' side! Haha! Personally, I would never truly do this either but I might THINK it. :)

[andrew mitchell]

Its about time she cracked and gave some of the medicine back because I think Karma was anxiously waiting to jump in too. A fun write!

[MelissaAndres]

Thank you, Andrew!

[Coyote Poetry]

A very good ending to a old tale. I like this one better. She was too kind. Cinderella needed some backbone. Thank you for sharing the excellent poetry dear Melissa.
Coyote

[MelissaAndres]

Haha! Thank you so much, Coyote Poetry!

[Coyote Poetry]

You are welcome my friend.

[Gee]

Yeahhhhhh,go cinders,go cinders.Now this is my cup of tea.Sweeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeet.

[MelissaAndres]

Better watch that tea, Gee! Cinderelly may still be lurking around somewhere! Haha! :)

[Mister T.]

"Shan't" I just looked this up, and apparently it's correct English. I've never heard of this before actually, is it a combination of 'shall' and 'not'? I guess it's just old English. Sorry, I was curious xd
Funny poem. I think this poem perfectly shows how people have changed into what they are nowadays. If the fairytale was rewritten in 2016, this would've been a perfect replacement for the original one. It could be me, it's just how I interpreted it. Was this your intention?
So, taking that into account, very realistic poem, to an extent. Enjoyable anyway :)

[MelissaAndres]

Yes, Mister T. 'Shan't' is basically 'proper' English if you will. It's not really used anymore except probably by very rich, very snobby people. Haha! I think that in the fairytale Cinderella was too polite to do what she truly wanted to do -- this is just my take on what was probably REALLY going on in her head. Glad you enjoyed it!

[Mister T.]

I okay, I see what you mean. You're probably right, if the reader were to see her thoughts this is how the story would've ended xD

[MelissaAndres]

Yeah, it was just a silly little thing I came up with. Nothing serious about it.

[annalysiar]

This is awesome. Great write

[MelissaAndres]

Thank you, annalysiar!

[alifeacoustic]

Oh Melissa, I knew there must be a mischievous twinkle in your eye, or should that be sinister? :)
Love how it twists from the happy ever afters and goes straight to "get outta my way, I'm late"
You treat people bad, they gonna bite. :)

[MelissaAndres]

Now you've seen my 'evil' side! Bwah hahaha! I just figure Cinderella was too polite and perhaps this is was she was REALLY thinking. :)

[~*~Peace Keeper~*~]

Haha interesting take on Cinderella, though I think I like her loving self more, even if she did dislike and hate her treatment, she still tried to have a kind heart. xD but you did do a good job in this version, and it seems like it could happen. I like how you used the rhyming and how it flows.

[MelissaAndres]

Peace Keeper, Just a funny little bit of the 'evil' side in me. haha I do like Cinderella kind heart too but this is just a silly little fantasy of perhaps what may have really been inside her head. We all have that moment where we could snap.

[~*~Peace Keeper~*~]

XD haha yeah I am sure some thoughts passed through her head, and maybe daydreamed about it.

[MelissaAndres]

Ya never know! :)

[~*~Peace Keeper~*~]

Haha yeah (:

[ANTO]

I was hoping the Fairy Godmother would have stuck the boot in too for good measure. lol
This is certainly a twist - and about time too. LOL
(I have this image of Peter Falk's 'Columbo' holding the stubby cigar to his forehead saying.."Errr.emmm...I have just one more question Miss Cinders....)

thanks for the laugh Melissa

[MelissaAndres]

You're welcome, Anto! Glad you enjoyed it. I always thought Cinderella was a bit too polite and I figured that maybe, just maybe, this was really what was in her mind. I bet Columbo would have had her figured out from the start. Haha!

[wordman]

it would blend right in with the story!

[MelissaAndres]

Thank you, wordman!