Nothing Has Changed

You were wrong when you said,
that I hadn't changed at all.
But it's obvious we can't go back,
to how it was before.

Before I lost faith,
when I still believed in my self.
Before my heart hurt so much.
Back when I could say enough is enough.

Before I knew the true meaning of trust.
Before I learned that love is the same as lust.
Back when I only saw an innocent boy.
Before I realized that I was just your toy.

Now I am battered, broken and torn.
Now I am lost in the past where I was once adored.
Now I am ruining the only chance I have left;
the only way I can take hold of eternal happiness.

Now I am stuck in the land of what if's and maybe's,
wondering if it would be wonderful to still be your baby.
Now I am bitter and angry all the time.
Now I can't help searching for some kind of sign.

A sign that what happened was for the best,
even though it feels terribly wrong.
A sign that I can keeping living and still hold on.
A sign that I can finally change and move on.