Starving for Perfection

Just trying out some things. Let me know what you think.

Flaws, flaws, everywhere

Asymmetrical bodies, faces and hair.

See the images, let them rush through your mind

That the media shows us through the cameras they hide behind.

 

You’re fat and ugly, you stupid little w***e.

Why don’t you just go eat some more?

They judge us, mimic and tear us apart,

When they say we’re not good enough, they don’t bother to see the broken in our hearts.

Because we are the flawed, that’s the message through and through,

And if you were starving for the perfection they show us, you would be too.

Reviews

[Eagle Cruagh]

I have to make a few observations that seem to be part
of what you have written.
First: All women are perfect, each different, but all perfect.
All women become better until they are 30 then they have
reached the zenith of perfection and they just get a little better.
I think you get the idea.
Thank you, ]
----- John (Eagle Cruagh)

[fernii]

I really like this poem, its so true and everyone tries their best to fit into the stereotypes of what others think they should look like. :)

[Hello, Goodbye]

in brevity you demonstrate so much.. i love the strong control of angst and resolute delivery of the message and feelings. great poetic expressions

[ColorblindMartian.]

this is easily going into my favorites haha

[MikeTheMechanic]

Really like this one, reminds me vaguely of "Trust Your Mechanic" by The Dead Kennedys, except much more poetic and less rocky and random in its flow. Like a lot!

[Samantha (:]

Probably my favorite poem I've reviewed so far on this site. Grant it, I've only had an account for a few days but I still love it! We ALL face the struggle against the way the media portrays humans and the way we actually are, pressured to always be something it's impossible to achieve. Everyone can relate to this. I love it.

[Viki Rachel]

It is so true how pressured we all are to be perfect. I hate seeing those models and just thinking "I wonder how many girls have killed themselves to look like that." I wish more plus-sized models came out on Victoria's Secrets magazines and other billboards all over the place. Who says that perfection is beauty?
I agree so much with this poem. Good write.

[aBillings]

This is a tough subject to address through poetry... and you did a great job. (: I love it. My favorite line: "They judge us, mimic and tear us apart." I think it shows the true viciousness that the media expels.
Great job.

[reminder]

Your message s true. Very intense. Bravo!

[GamingGal]

Pros: You chose a good topic here, one I haven't seen many poems on. You have a rhyme scheme that helps out the flow, and your word choice is nice.

Cons: Not much of a con, but rather a suggestion. Some of the lines, the fourth in the first stanza for example, are quite long and throw off the flow. Same with the fourth line in the second stanza. I think you tried to make this poem rhyme. If so, don't force it to rhyme. Write it as it comes to you, from the heart. Rhyming is only good when it fits.

Overall: You did a good job at conveying this topic.