July 28, 2014

       To even think of those who personally know me, to even consider me a preacher, is beyond unnerving.  I only wish them to know that I am simply a human just as they are.  I cannot figure out why it is so terrifying to me when those whom I used to party with and so heavily drink around, just a few weeks ago, are reading these writings.  What is the point of writing for You, if there is to be no outward expression of joy in me for others to witness?!  It is physically impossible to fake such a wonderful feeling.  The analogies You have recently given me, do not seem to make sense when written.  Not just that, but in the midst of being written, at that very moment I attempt to prove Your love and truth, I hit a brick wall.  The words being written cannot compare to what You have said to me.  There is not even a sense of fulfillment after being written!  I have been completely exhausted in regards to my nonstop search for Your love and mercy.  I have been spiritually running in Your direction to an unknown destination with only a ten minute water break between each twenty miles of sprinting.  I have no doubt and through faith, this will be for my spiritual benefit.  My emotions are screaming at my Holy Spirit for some type of encouragement, so that I am not singled out by the wolves.  There is not even the sound of a cricket.  Must I hang my flesh out for their target practice?  To have a clear mind, I do avoid alcohol, which renders me awkward and practically handicap in social situations.  I may never know why You made me this way.  There will be no intentions for this to be posted... at least not at this current time.
        I do not own a desire to rile guilt with anyone.  I do not judge, even when tempted.  It is the love I have for those I know, that is being finely dialed into the truth.  Sensitivity is being amplified to their well being.  You have given me the most non confrontational personality, yet it feels like that is exactly what You want me to accomplish.  I am waiting.

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[Meboe]

Yes that is most definitely true. Can be exhausting at times.

[~*~Peace Keeper~*~]

God's power is worked through our weakness, He sometimes puts us in places that is out of our comfort zone in order to help us grow in Him. It is comforting knowing though, that God is with us in those tough situations, loving us and helping us. Through Him we can overcome our many obstacles, but only through Him. I am still working on many things in my life, but I know He has a plan for me, I just have to be opened to Him.

Good Job