Apathy

Apathy

Aluminum Heart
Cellophane eyes unblinking
Hot wax lips dripping

I once knew a girl; She loved me so

Lungs as black as tar
Wrists cut open like a cake
Pretzeled spinal cord

I spat in her face and walked away

Wallpaper peeling
There is no sanctuary
Drowning gutters weep

She begged me not to go

Vomit soaked sneakers
Knees weak from the burning need
I just want a fix

I was already gone

Author's Note

Complements and critiques please

Reviews

[Adreamer's Bluejay]

I love the word choice here, it is completely unusual to be seen together, in fact it reminds me of something that would be written by one of my favorite unknown bands. Anyway, sorry for my mini rant. I love how honest you were able to be within a write so heartbreakingly written. I really like the style you used for this piece, it perfected your silk like flow.

Phenomenal write. I love this.

[Dipanjan Dutta]

The choice of words is gorgeous...the essence felt deep down somewhere...the writing style so lucid yet bold....a master's stroke...loved this poem

[Kat Leila]

Lovely....no I don't think so. Raw and completely painful...yes. But poetry is supposed to make you feel, yes I felt.

[jzadski]

Beautiful piece! I love the use of writing and I've never seen something like this before, which was absolutely refreshing. Great work. x

[The Black Warrior]

Love the word choice, I really enjoyed reading this. It is well written and it just flows perfectly. Truly love this.

Well Done! :D

[Sleepless]

you do have talent at writing, like the prose !

[Angad Waraich]

Its unusual and different.
And i did actually enjoy it a fine read.
Thank you for sharing

[KWP]

this is fresh and fabulous ..

I like it very much ... easy rhythm and flow, two threads, a tapestry of images

Intriguing and leaves you wanting more ..

what a talent ... xx

[ConfuzzledKidd]

I enjoyed this thought you captured it well and you had an interesting choice of words. I look forward to what you post next!