The Voices

When the storm is outside, you may find shelter. When the storm is within your mind, how can you escape?

The raindrops fall

They pelt those who walk under them

Forcefully, without mercy

“Stupid”

They whisper.

You may try to run faster,

But the rain will fall harder

“Idiot” “Slow”

The raindrops will say.

Try to protect yourself

With umbrellas and raincoats

The rain will soak through.

“Unworthy” “Unforgivable” “Lothesome”

You may reach shelter.

But just because the rain can no longer reach you

Does not mean you are dry.

Author's Note

Tell me what you think! I have a feeling this one can be improved, haha! I also realized that most of the things I post here are so melancholy! I am capable of writing happy things! I promise!

Reviews

[Ranger Kessel]

Its good and your nite makes me want to write happy. I am capable if that a well I think

[_rabbitofhabit (1word)]

I like it. I can’t lie, I don’t know very much about poetry.

I think something should be done with “Idiot” “Slow” as that doesn’t look like the appropriate grammar.

If I had to say anything, I’d say please expand the poem. Continue it.

I also really like the title, though I'm not sure it is the most fitting.

[Marztothemoon]

Thanks for your review! I definitely see your point about the wording and the title. I'll have to think about what I can change them to. I don't know if I'll expand it more though. I wrote it at a time when I had EXTREMELY low self esteem and I've grown a lot since then, so I don't know if I'll be able to truly tap into the feelings that inspired the poem. Perhaps another time. Again, thank you so much for your review!