Withstanding

I cannot keep holding myself together

Sometimes, when I am feeling

awful,

With thoughts pounding in my head,

telling me the worst things,

bringing up the worst memories,

I hyperventilate.

I cannot breathe, 

Nor do I try to.

Because when I’m feeling

awful,

I hope to die

and I try to.

It cannot be stopped-- 

This death wish upon me,

Except for the fact 

that I do not have a gun

on me, when I’m feeling

awful.

Author's Note

Comments appreciated <3

Don't struggle alone. Talk with someone.
Or
Bring them down with you.