Cut

Cutting. (For a school monologue. And, yes, my teacher did approve this.) please review cuz i need to get a good grade on this, thanks ^0^

I wanted to do this. But I am a little scared now. I quickly shake myself, telling myself that I have nothing to be afraid of. Mother and Father are still screaming at each other down stairs. They could go on for hours, well into the night. I should have enough time. I take out the small Swiss-army knife that I stole from the toolbox, and carve a line into my wrist. I watch as the blood slowly beads out. It hurts, but I can’t stop now what I have already started. I continue, slicing deeper and deeper into my flesh with each cut. The blood is flowing faster now, and my heart starts to pound. In fact, this is too much; much more than I expected. I look again at my wounds, and I realize that my blood is going everywhere. I drop the knife in the ever-growing red pool on the floor, the scent of blood scent filling my nostrils. I get on my knees, trying to pick up the knife, but I realize that I have cut too deep, and that I can no longer move my hand. I clutch my wrist in an attempt to make the hurt stop, and to feel my hand again. My vision starts to blur, and I can’t think straight. All I know is that I am drowning in my own blood, my own memories, salty and bitter.

Author's Note

PLEASE TELL ME HOW I CAN MAKE THIS AS MONOLOGUE-Y AS POSSIBLE!!! thanks ^0^

Reviews

[Weaver]

"down stairs" - "downstairs"
"small Swiss-army knife" - "small Swiss Army knife"
"cut too deep" - "deeply" - no comma after
no comma after "make the hurt stop"
Well, you've managed to write about something angsty (I think the current slang is "emo") without making it sound that way. In fact, I can see why your teacher approved this topic for a monologue: you take away the false glamour and tell it like it is. The narrator ends up regretting an action that he/she cannot undo.

[Juliet Monroe]

It's a very good story, and wonderful imagery... I'm not sure about a monologue, though. It certainly has potential--keep playing with it.
And I agree with everyone else here; I'd love to see what happens next!

[Taylor Ann]

Wow that was amazing really makes you think. You should add more to this, it's very nice!

[Christopher.Holmberg]

This is rather eerie, i like it haha. The sudden twist nearing the end provokes a few unrecognized thoughts, interesting..you don't dream of this do you? :P Anyway, great poem, very dark and enlightening. 10/10!!!

[thatscenechikkmarie(:]

Outstanding. I could sense the emotions in my own self. I think this is great. (:

[LovelyWords]

This is a very good monologue, if your planning on telling a story. Most monolouges are written as if your talking to someone else, but their not there. I had to do them in theater too, but I would say that inless you plan on making it sound like your telling a story, just to like act like your talking to a friend about your problems at home, and why you cut, almost write as if you met someone, a boy or someone and they find out you cut and then you tell them why.

Hope this helped and made sense.

[YouoweYoupay]

That was so sad. I could almost feel the pain throbbing in the skin of my wrists. Your emotions were very well described. Thank you for sharing.

-Wella.

[Honey]

i guess ill be writing more to go with this then..
but you know, it was kinda meant to make you wonder what happens next

[KAREN]

It's really very good! I wish you would had to it, because I'm dying to know what happens next!!