The last stanza in this piece throws me off guard -
"Deep within life's unsolved mystery
Each of you still lives within my heart
I know I won’t remain in your minds"
It is such a sad thing to say - to be thought of life this. However with this piece being as dark as it is, It is a very thought provoking work of art. One I had a read a few times.
"What then was all this for?
On reflection I do not know
My place is not reserved"
These lines here are so powerful - again pricking at your mind... and it is depressing to think of this, what is it all for - a place for your life, a reservation never to be finalized.
This piece is so haunting, I can not get it out of my head, and it is written so well. Each word flows into the next - setting up the next stanza perfectly. I have to say again the last stanza really blows my mind... Excellent piece of work here.
Thank you for sharing.
Beautifully written. You express emotion calmer and more.....elegant (i think thats the word i'm looking for) than most. Many people go straight for the point, but you wove it into the piece. Great poem!
I expected this poem to be raw and blunt, but not at all. Your beautifully worded expressions are quite calm, and yet, they carry deep meaning. Excellent.
I loved this poem! I loved the way you have woven this with a mystic effect! Reading this poem is like peeling it off layer by layer.... on the outset it's a tale of a man dying a bloody death, unloved by people, but its so much a story for all of us! Throughout our lives we strive for glory n fame and most of the time we end up without doing something substantial .. You have done a great job with this poem to depict a truth of so many lives. ..
I like this poem... it feels like a mystery guest is in the room. It left me curious enough to read again and still I am wondering... and so Your poem remains on my mind. Excellent!!!
Oh wow! This really makes the reader reflect, big time!
What shadows still adorn the gone...are they forgotten because they did not do more...on the other hand, it shows that the heart of those not with with us still remember...maybe people should not be so quick to judge those whom do not float directly in the vision throughout their life for they still possibly remember, lament!
Remarkable and thought provoking xo