Broken *chapter 1*

"Look at me!" I scream with tears in my eyes. "I'm a monster!"

As he gives me a dirty look he tells me to calm down.

At this point I think he knows that I'm not going to listen.

"Why should I!" I yell. " You abandon me completely and expect me to be calm?"

"The sooner you learn to live with it the easier it will be." he says quietly.

My mind goes blank and my blood starts to boil.

" You're putting me through hell and now you're telling me to live with it?" I say as I laugh a little.

I feel sick on my stomach as I continue.

" What the hell is wrong with you? A month ago I would've done anything for you....now its like I don't even know you."

As he looks at the ground I see two tears hit the ground.

" Well maybe you never did."

I start to soften a little. " Look I know you have your problems as well, but you didn't need to drag me into it." 

" What happened?" i think to myself. I'm not even me anymore. I've morphed into what I see in my nightmares.

I look at him once more. " I have to go.." I say quietly. " Will I be able to see you again tomorrow?"

He shrugs while keeping his head down.

His looks are deceiving. His light blonde hair and clear blue eyes make him look as if he doesn't have a care in the world, even though hes going through the worst pain possible. 

After I finally get home the dead silence would usually drive me insane, but i'm thankful for it at the moment. I'm getting a break from all the screaming in my head from the last week.

I avoid looking in my mirror at risk of seeing my true self.

I'm on the verge of a break down as i sit on my bed.

The screaming that i thought was gone was back and louder than ever. A tear flows down my cheek followed by another and another.

The old me is gone. All this change is me crying for help. Can anyone hear me? Or does my pain just not matter? No one cares and I know it, but its not like i can feel anything anymore. I'm numb, which is way worse than pain.

I feel like I'm trapped in a black bottomless pit and no one is coming to help. once again i wonder what happened, but then i realize, he never really cared in the first place. It was all just a pretty lie, like life and death.

I remember a story that a friend had told me.

One day life asks death "Why do people love me, but hate you?"

Death looks at life and replies " Because you are a beautiful lie and I am an ugly truth."

Darkness consumes me choking out all light and leaving me alone and vulnerable. I try to change and live with this new found secret, but there is nothing I can do to make it seem likes its a good thing. 

So as i lay here I make no attempt to smile because i know what I am.

" This is me letting go of everything I used to be and giving up." I whisper to myself. " There is nothing left for me."

There are no sad goodbyes. no last words. It's simply me laying down and letting go of myself and transforming into a complete monster.

My last thoughts before totally slipping away are "Say goodbye to the girl you used to know."

Author's Note

Tell me what you think

Reviews

[elioaks]

I think it has potential to go places. The grammar needs to be cleaned up and if you formatted it a little differently to where the dialogue was easier to follow, I would enjoy reading it much more.

[Erin DeLis]

Oooh, very mysterious. I really want to know she is, or what it is she's just found out about herself. Can't wait to read more.

[Ryanicus]

Brilliant, dialogue is very realistic. It reminds me of someone getting turned into a werewolf :3