Reality of War

I feel this poem has an important message, therefore I share it here on writerscafe with you

 

How would you feel,

if all you loved suddenly was taken away from you,

your father and mother, your siblings and friends,

and all you had fought for failed in front of your eyes,

without a chance to talk to a person to get advice.

 

Then how would you feel,

if you heard a bang outside your window, louder than thunder,

and screams and cries. People fleeing from evil men’s terror,

so obsessed in their lies that they believe it completely,

and you cannot think them wrong, not even discreetly.

 

Now can you see it? Blood, lying everywhere on the ground.

People screaming in madness and crying, begging for help,

but there is no one there to help them, for all is gone, just gone,

and the people you love dead. Yourself? you are only to be a pawn.

How does this make you feel?

 

Then, just as suddenly as it appeared, it is just as suddenly gone.

All is left for silence, so loud that there is nothing else but it.

Can you hear it? Do you feel it? Nothing but unforgiveable silence.

All is kept under wrap for the civilian, it makes more hunger for violence.

How do they feel?

 

He that forgives is the only one to celebrate peace, but not for long.

As soon as he thinks of peace, another one thinks of revenge.

This is the circle of our world, with innocent people who feel, who suffer.

I only have one question! Why hate when you have so much good to offer?

How does this make you feel?

 

© 2008 Maria Retz

Author's Note

Please let me know if you find errors in the text, I am trying to learn English as fluently as possible. Thank you

Reviews

[Emily B]

This is a wonderfully powerful write. The horrors of war stand out in any language. Your passion stirs a sluggish heart on Monday morning.

[Samuel Dickens]

I'm doing this second review after Maria made some small changes to her poem. For my taste, I love this powerful and gripping poem. Its ring of authenticity leads one to believe that it was penned by one who has seen the unspeakable horrors of war. The words are not arranged exactly the way that an English-as-a first-language speaker would do it, but to me, that is part of its honest appeal.
You have done an excellent job here, Maria, and I commend you for it.

[Samuel Dickens]

Assuming that English is your second language, Maria, I'd say that you've done exceptionally well. There are a few errors which I will point out if you want me to, but they are minor.
The message of your poem gripped my heart and made me want to somehow put a stop to the madness. Bless you for your strength and courage, and I wish you success in all your endeavors.