Death by Toys

God knows how I love my boys,
he also knows I loathe their toys.
Little legos and wooden trains,
always causing trips and sprains.
I grab a bag and silently creep,
throwing sh*t out while they sleep.
Careful placement a siren blares,
I slowly back out tripping on chairs.
Stealth mode isn't stealth at all,
as I pull ninja moves but somehow fall.
The littlest rises up with a smile,
"Mommy, is that my crocodile?"
Of course I cower and hand it over,
Through clumsiness I've blown my cover.
Feeling like the Grinch with the whos,
I dump the bag out and tend to the bruise.
I guess I just won't get my way,
those toys will be my death one day!

Author's Note

Humor about nonsense!

Reviews

[OT]

hahaha brilliant!!! the stealth tactics that fail! getting rumbled by the far too observant kids - you're not getting them toys!! not until they're collecting dust in an attic in many years to come!! great humour! couplets perfect choice for it! nice, nice, nice!!!

[HoorayForUnderdog]

Thanks for the laugh! Your line "throwing s**t out while they sleep" made me spew my drink!! I remember those days. HWAAaaa!

[Coyote Poetry]

I know your feeling. My daughter are home with two boys of 2 years old and 19 months. I must turn the light on anywhere I walk or break my neck. A very good poem. I agree with the ending.
Coyote

[Closed Account]

Could not have said it better!

[HopelesslyDevoted]

oh dude! this is so going to give me nightmares tonight.

[GamingGal]

Haha, this poem made me giggle, especially when the mother was caught. I know my mom has thrown away my stuffed animals before. I was always pretty miffed to find out a beloved of mine was missing.

[Dilan Gray]

I love this! I love how it is funny but you can get the seriousness as well. You made it both and did it well! I love the ninja part! I thought this was very clever and unique! I absolutely love it! Great poem!

[sarah]

lol a great poem!

[Amanda Dawn Sanderson-G..]

Ha! I loved it. :) Great rhymes, great flow... and indeed how things would go! ;)

[Chelsea]

This is such a funny and brilliant piece of writing!
I have a niece and nephew so I understand the "lingo" of the toys. That was quite genius!!
Oh I just love this poem! Such a funny piece!

[Doreen]

This is brilliant! LOL Anyone who has been around kids can most certainly relate to this. Fantastic write.