Heart's Rendering

A broken heart’s rendering

Far beyond pain

What is it I feel?

What is it I see?

 

 

I can’t even see me

So lost in this dark

That crowds all around

Confining my heart

 

 

A prison, a tomb

like stone cold and gray

It presses against me

On all sides it restrains

 

 

I cover my head

Bent down to my knees

I plead “please don’t destroy me”

“Just let me see day”

 

 

One instant of light

One single ray

One moment of hope

Shining on me

 

 

A glimpse of the future

Of love far away

But light brings the hope

It will be here one day

 

 

 

Author's Note

Ok, just tell me what you think..... Good? Bad?

Reviews

[David Lewis Paget]

Interesting. But you're portraying yourself as a helpless victim, without the power to take an independent course of your own volition. You remain tied to the beneficence of others, to raise you out of your malaise by loving you. In doing this you are merely laying the foundation for further heartbreak in the future, once again rejected.

I plead "please don't destroy me"
"Just let me see day"

You should never allow others to wield such an awful power over you. Be an individual, stand up and stare them proudly in the face and say - 'I am!'

[M.M.]

interesting poem shows alot of pain

[emz]

This is a wonderful portrayal of heartbreak.. its very emotional but with a lovely end... there is always light at the end of the tunnel, we just need to open our eyes and see

Lovely poem michelle


x

[Carole]

You describe a broken heart perfectly, Michelle. Far beyond pain, being blinded by the overwhelming feelings that have attached themselves to brokenness, lost in the dark, feeling constrained/in prison. Brokenness destroys many a heart because they don't know how to break out and be healed.

There is nothing like that ray of hope that breaks through-comforting us and helping us to keep on keepin' on. I am always amazed when that encouragement comes. It can't be anything less than an angel of the Lord sent to minister to us, or the Holy Spirit.

Though your poem starts our dark and dreary., I love how you end with the light breaking through the darkness causing the reader to go from doom and gloom to light and hope!

Wonderfully written, my friend. :-)