Ode for a Mallet

Written pre deletion day. October 2007.

 

Ode for a Mallet

 

My Christmas list has changed; you no longer need to hunt,

Give to me a mallet, I want to smack the f*cking c*nt.

 

Go nowhere near the jewellers; show me wood and stone,

Forget the need for compact disc, music? Let him groan.

 

No need for streams of tinsel, or holly on a sprig,

I shall remove his bollocks and then hang them from a twig.

 

Oh come yea merry gentlemen, come one and all,

Inspect my smile of happiness……. for the man has no right ball.

 

Reviews

[Mark Pearce]

Ouch.

VERY direct, which is what I think poetry should be free to be.

Well titled too. It leaves the adventure of the verse to reign.

[Shane Patrick]

twisted message and I know the antagonist needs a sledge wonderful my friend spill frustration..

[Nick Erickson]

Wonderfully twisted, but why stop with just the right ball... take 'em both. Two matching ornaments for your christmas tree... Rhymed wonderfully.

[Jaclyn]

BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Brutal, clever, funny. I'm still smilling.

I like your raging! I really do. So ALIVE! Especially now when I'm kind of down and out, this makes me feel so much better! :) I agree with Bubo, this MADE MY DAY, IF NOT MY WEEK.

[Bubo]

Ha ha
this has made my day, my week!!!
Fab piece and so so funny!!I just love all the swear words and the rhyme as I was singing "The 12 days of Christmas"............and so so spot on today of all days!
I love you my friend xx

[Rebecca]

Yes!!! I love this - "Inspect my smile of happiness ..... For the man has no right ball."

Oh I love it!! I want that line on a t-shirt.