Unknown Killer

She cant move because if she does she too will be dead.

I crouch in the corner
Afraid to make a sound
For my unknown killer might hear me
And take my precious life away from me

I dont know who
Or even what he is
Just another unknown killer
That took me from this life I lived

I hide away
In a room he keeps me in
Its dark
And smells of rotten wood

I am a lifeless soul
And another hopeless victim
Whose life is slowly
Fading away

Around me I see skeletons
Of unknown victims
That were hopeless souls like myself
Now dead....

I move an inch
And take one breath
And then I hear it
Footsteps from my unknown killer

The door opens
Here my unknown killer stands
He aims his gun at me
And bang! I'm dead...

Author's Note

I dont know. I was just bored and everyone wanted something new so I guess this will have to do. Hope you like it! It mite need some work so tell me what you think

Reviews

[JenLyn]

It's dark and mysterious which I like a lot, cause I am dark and mysterious. But what really made me like this poem was the last two lines, "He aims his gun at me
And bang! I'm dead..." Keep writing!

[Poetic Beauty]

This has a bit of mystery to it and it is dark. The flow is nicely done.

[Angie Diane♥&hea..]

Wow...this is was the best poem I have ever read I love it. Hehe Thanks for sharing.

[AbsentElements]

When writing poetry, especially trying to make it different and new, it usually doesn't turn out the way you want it but most of the time it is just fine. This is one of those times. A very interesting write.

[MissWordSmith]

ok. this one made no sense to me! is it just me?!
was it supposed to be metaphoric?
and there were too many me me meees and they who died died died....
it was not thought out very well. sorry.

[Frantzuu]

I like the theme of this piece, and u did a great job on this.

[rockinmiley555]

its dark and brings out excitement and danger. it really pulls the reader in and gets them wondering what will happen at the end. this is a great write.

[Tina Kline]

Intense and dark. Love it!

[Mauricio Montoya]

Well it is different but pretty good for a first timer I like how you take us though this write till it ends. Good job well done.

[*Kantola*]

This is definitely new and far from love related :)
I liked it!!!
Very suspenseful, and very descriptive. I kept wondering what was going to happen. "reading, reading, reading, BANG!"
Great job, Manda! :D
I've had a couple of dreams like this... but a scientific theory is, the night you die in your sleep is when you die in real life. I always wake up before I die though. Could be true! :)
VERY NICE topic, for a change!