Healing

Depression, for me, is a many splendored phenomenon.

It's eating junk food all day but feeling sick at the thought of real food.

It's watching my favorite show for hours on end but not truly absorbing the plot(Don't worry, though, I still cry during the sad parts).

It's loving someone so much more than myself that I question why they love me.

It's failed relationships because my constand need for reassutance and his inability to communicate imploded.

It's self-sabotage, it's not washing my hair for a week(and I'm a hairstylist), it's walking outside in the freezing cold without a jacket.

But sometimes I don't see that.

Sometimes...

It's waking up after spending a night having fun with friends and realizing I did have fun.

It's curling into the chest of someone I love , feeling completely sure that it will be okay.

It's seeing my mom come over to my house and start cleaning or her buying me a garden gnome and feeing every bit of her love without us having to say a word.

It's my best friend's kids curling up in my lap even after I punished them.