Beautiful Angel, Hidden Secret

A poem of love and angst. Something I have needed to express but have left it inside for too long. Please anyone who reads this please comment on this one. I would really appreciate it.

He is beautiful and I stand here in awe,
In his presence I am his, willing.
Serving him without question
This he knows but he doesn't know it all

I have a burning desire to give him everything
A yearning to kiss his sweet lips without care
However much I want it, he keeps me at bay.
I keep myself at sea.

As long as I see him, he pleases me more than he knows.
His words are of symphonies to my ears.
His smile is my light
But silence is my gift, a tortured arrangement.

Secretly he tears me into pieces, not knowing
Yet I love him still, I am still bound
A tie I cannot break, nor am I willing to
I silently weep for what cannot be.

If he finds out, I am damned
Cursed to live alone, without my angel,
My fantasy lover, my immortal soul mate.
I crave for the next life, to unite us.

When he is gone, I crave him
Like a fiend without their drug
I am black like empty space
Only he can fill it.

Oh God, why torture me so,
Let me be un-caged, he can tame me
I am calling for my beautiful angel,
Though I hide these hidden secrets.

Reviews

[dw817]

Wow, this poem appeared in my activity sheet between ad-frames ?
Oh let's see what we have then.

"However much I want it, he keeps me at bay. I keep myself at sea." that's pretty clever speech.

Sometimes - an angel is only there when we need them the most. It is said that an angel is in fact not a person who has risen from Earth but the actual definition is a special being that is without independent action or consciousness and acts solely and spiritually on the direct will of God.

And - God can be difficult to understand sometimes for us mortals, so if you take that all into account, there will be days where you might need to solve problems on your own and by yourself.

Hang in there. I think God is all about independent thinking, especially if we can work ourselves out of our problems without relying on Divine Guidance and Grace.

As for missing a lover, realize it is not just you that misses this person, for if the love is equivocal, they miss and desire your company as well, please consider.

[Girl Friday (Sarah W.)]

An interesting piece indeed...I have been here before. This reminds me of a time several years ago when I was infatuated with a certain person and he seemed distant in a strange way...I was giving to him what I thought that he wanted of me, but in reality it was just a shade of the truth of myself. Metaphorically, I like the idea of God and angels...this gives things a little different perspective. I liked this one...

[Careline]

WELCOME TO MY WORLD HONEY! Oh Goddess I have this same predicament, but there's nothing I can do about it. Oh, and he knows, too! It's a rather funny story, actually...

[David Scott]

The poem is lovely.
I understand the meaning behind the words, "I keep myself at sea."
There have been a few poems here with this same verbiage and I find it fits well here.

"If he finds out, I am damned", this stanza reads like the honest feelings of an irrational mindset. We are not always rational in our loves... This is normal and human, even if it is not constructive or entirely healthy. Knowing this as you do and including the clear description gives authenticity to the poem. I like it when a poem is not overly guarded and hidden in context.

I was asked a question about dealing with this same type of issue in my own life. It is hard to live with, but easier to understand others once you have gone through it. Oh, the question... "If a love cannot live in the light of day for all to see, is it something we would desire to have for ourselves or for the one we have found our soul mated with? The story usually unfolds into a tragedy...

It changes not the heart cry, "Oh God, why torcher me so,".
You captured this all too common conundrum very well.

[Ravyne Hawke]

This is a beautiful poem of unrequited love.. the longing and desire are woven throughout this piece perfectly. One cannot help but feel the sadness here. I've experienced this myself.. to save my sanity, I had to let him go. Great job, Nickie!

[G.A. Collins]

This is purely stunning. You hear see the passion in the speaker's voice, and your wording just helplessly drags the reader either into the emotional state of zed speaker, or into a state of sympathy for such a tortuous situation. It also stirs something inside; the ending truly concludes the sorrowful reality of their love-
"I am calling for my beautiful angel,
Though I hide these hidden secrets."
It makes me think they are yearning within to call to the heavens for their emotions, but because they know it will do the no good, they simply suffer in silence.
Although the scenarios are different, this reminds me of the feelings I felt when I lost a friend- the unbearable longing to have them back, but not ever being able to let it be so.

[NA]

This is brilliant hun...superbly penned! :) x

[Cynthia R]

I love this! Beautiful writing, and I love the cleverness of words. Simply lovely.

[CharM105]

WOW! Simple but very heartfelt. I felt every emotion in every word. I think it's safe to say we've all been there. We want something we can't have. In the end, sometimes it's for the best and consider it an opportunity for something better...

[jacob erin-cilberto]

loving from a distance is so hard...when that person doesn't even notice us...yet we fanatasize being with him or her.

tough..i have experienced a love i could not express...she was not free.