Fake Smiles

Fake smiles I wear

Trying to pretend

Trying to make it through the weekend

To not show my despair

 

Trying to not let them know

That I’m falling apart

Don’t let them see my heart

Don’t let them in my soul

 

For just one wrong move

And I’ll fall to pieces right there

Or I’ll start to compare

So much I’ve gotta improve

 

But you see, that’s where it goes wrong

I’m not good at faking it

So they start to see, bit by bit

And it doesn’t take too long

 

Until I’m a complete mess

Because I can’t fake that smile

Haven’t been okay in awhile

And well, you know the rest

 

And now they do too

For without thinking, I start to speak

And what’s when I start to freak

Unfortunately, this isn’t new

And you think, talking must help right?

But sometimes it just makes it worse

I guess this is my curse

It’s the battle I have to fight

 

For often, people don’t know how to feel

When someone starts talking like this

So instead of reassurances, they just dismiss

Making me regret being real

 

Phrases I’ve heard a  million times

People all talk the same

It’s like this endless game

That plays in our minds

 

So, it’s back to trying to be fake

Hoping someday I’ll learn

So, I can hide this burn

Don’t know how much more I can take.

 

Author's Note

Still new at this, please have patience.