Silent Loves

When I was a little child, my grandmother told me that it was a bad sign if a phone was received at midnight. That night after my grandmother answered the call, I got the news that my grandfather passed away. I have never thought of receiving that kind of calls again since then. Now, I am on the airplane flying back to Hong Kong to attend my father’s funeral.

Thinking back, I was still working on my final research paper last night. I was busy with doing research, reading books and drawing mind maps. I paid too much attention on my work since it is important for my future career. Finally, I picked up the phone. Once I picked my phone up, my mom said angrily that she had kept calling me all day. I felt so sorry for ignoring her call after knowing that she wanted to tell me bad news about the death of my daddy. I knew that my parents would leave me one day but I have never expected that it will happen so soon.

It was a long way flying back home from the US and I hated the journey when I was missing home. A second, a minute and an hour went by, I was beginning to feel amazingly sleepy.  

All of a sudden, there was a gentle voice saying “wake up Xiaoyu, wake up! We are going out for shopping today.” I was so confused how this man knew the way I was called in my childhood. When I opened my eyes and sat on my bed, I saw that there was a little girl wearing in pink sleeping right by my side. I guessed she was around the age of seven or eight. Looking around the place I was in, there was a flap table right at the center. On my right hand side, there were many photos on the wall .When I was looking at the photos closely, I saw my mum, my dad , my sister and I  in the photos I guessed that I was back to my childhood, back to the time when I was living in Lower Ngan Tan Kok estate. The man suddenly shouted “Xiaoyu, have you got yourself ready? Be quick!” The little girl answered with an excitement “yes, Daddy!”

To my surprise, this man was my father and this sweet little girl was, me! The time when my father and the little Xiaoyu went out hand in hand and I decided to follow them behind. There was a long and wide corridor right in front of us. It was so comfortable that the wind blew on our face when I was walking in the corridor.

Xiaoyu said “Daddy, walk faster, walk faster!”

A stationery store worker said with a big smiling face “Hey! Going shopping with your daughter today?” Daddy said “Yes! I wanna buy a tiny bag for my Xiaoyu, she is going to a school picnic tomorrow.  Anything good for her?”

The stationery store worker said “Come in first, there are many in our store, why don’t you and Xiaoyu have a look? “ Then, the worker said to Xiaoyu “Xiaoyu, come with me and I can show you the most beautiful bags in Lower Ngan Tan Kok wanna have a look?”

Xiaoyu said with an excitement “Yes, I want to, thank you so much.” The worker patted on her head “how polite you are little girl!”

I could not believe what I saw! I was really in a shop in Lower Ngan Tan Kok Estate. There were many stores located downstairs of my home.  I saw myself carrying a tiny blue bag and holding my daddy's big hand when we were walking back home. I can’t help myself burst into tears since it won’t happen again. Those stores and those stationery workers… They have faded out and disappeared with my daddy in the development of big shopping malls within this decade…

I have never told my daddy that I still remembered he bought me a small and expensive bag for my school picnic day. Thinking back again, I have never told him that how excited I was to carry the bag to the picnic. I knew that he did love me even without saying a word. It is because he always chose to turn his love into actions, and so did I. However, he never understood me.

Suddenly, there was a group of kids who were running and keeping calling “Xiaoyu! Xiaoyu !Xiaoyu!” at my back. When I turned around, I saw them running towards little Xiaoyu. “Xiaoyu. wanna play  together? ” “Xiaoyu,I wanna play hide and seek!”  “Xiaoyu, let’s go!” They were Xiaoting, Xiao Li and Xiaowen,who were my best friends in Lower Ngau Tau Kok Estate.  I tried to say hello to them since we have not seen each other for more than ten years. However, it seemed that they could not see, or hear me no matter how hard I tried.

“Daddy, I wanted you to understand that I hoped that you could find a purpose in your own life because I wanted you to have a meaningful life though you had wasted a lot of time on gambling already.”

My daddy was a stubborn man and he hated changes even though things were wrong and did not make any sense. He spent most of his life studying the ways to win Mark Six. Spending most of his salary each month on Mark Six, he hoped to become a rich man one day. However, until now, that dream was just a dream only. Sometimes, my daddy won but most of the time he didn't. Therefore, he sometimes felt depressed and struck. I once told him ‘Daddy, easy money easy goes!  It would be happier if you earn money by your hard work rather than by your luck. It is a stupid game, Daddy!Then, he replied with  anger “ a stupid game ? Yeah, I know you are educated now!  I know you are smarter than me but little kid, you won't understand how adults' mind work!”

One day, when I arrived home from school. I saw my daddy wearing a golden ring with a happy face. Once I got into the house, he showed it to me immediately, and said 'See! This is how your dad's mind work!'At first, I remained silent and gazed at my dad for a few seconds. Then, Daddy said “how lucky I was, you should know I will become another Mr. Lee sooner or later! Good fortune is coming to us.” At that moment, I saw Xiaoyu, myself walking towards Dad angrily, grabbed his golden ring and then throw it out of the window. My mouth opened side when I saw little Xiaoyu threw daddy’s expensive ring out of the window.  Daddy said shockingly “What the hell are you doing here? Are you jealous of me? How come I got this bad daughter in my life this is a sign of bad luck!  Did you know that it is my lucky ring? How come you … how come you...Oh my god! God! Can I send this bad kid back to you?”

I saw myself running out of home without saying a word. I slammed the door shut when my Dad was complaining in tears about why he’s got a bad daughter.

I kept following myself, little Xiaoyuon the street that was near my home. I knew that she was looking for the ring of course. All of a sudden, I heard a man shouted loudly from my back “Xiaoyu , why  are you walking on the street? Have you lost your belongings? Anything that I can help you?  Then, Xiaoyu told the man what had just happened. The man said “Come with me. I think I can help you solve the problem.” Xiaoyu and I followed the man to a restaurant that was located downstairs of my home. “Xiaoyu , bring the wonton noodles back home with you and apologise to your dad. You should know that your dad loves eating wonton noodles in our restaurant!” “Thank you so much! I will pay for it tomorrow.” I said with my eyes filled with tears.

“No need to pay for the noodles, we are friends, right? Hope I can help you No more tears!.”

I have never told my daddy that I did love his funny smiling face. I could hardly see it in normal situations. My daddy once told me that he needed to join his classmates’ meeting. Therefore, he needed to dress up in suit with a tie that my younger sister bought him as a birthday present. It was so funny to see my daddy standing in front of the mirror to get himself ready. And he kept asking the same question, ‘do I look good? Formal or handsome?’  I have never thought that he enjoyed dressing up formally even he was not an expert. ‘Sure! You look so handsome tonight! ‘I replied excitedly. Every time, when my sister and I gave a compliment to my daddy, he smiled with his reddish face. Although Daddy only got this worn-out suit. I did love Daddy putting it on. The reasons were simple. He could enjoy himself, felt good and confident when he was in this suit. I have never told my daddy that I love seeing him in this way rather than seeing him suffering from sadness.

All of a sudden, I heard a young lady voice,’ wake up lady, wake up lady.’ When I opened my eyes, I saw a lady wearing red suit and she told me that the airplane has arrived in Hong Kong. I asked “what do you mean?” After a few minute, I remembered that I was on the airplane flying back to Hong Kong to attend my father’s funeral.

The rain was pouring down so heavily when I arrived in Hong Kong. After getting into a taxi, I said to the driver “Please, Lower Ngau Tau Kok estate, thank you.”  Then, I phoned my mom. “Mom, do you know where the suit is now?” She was so mad and said ' what on earth   are you talking about, we do not have enough time now, come here quickly. ‘She might think that her daughter was crazy to talk about a suit at that moment. I replied ' No, No, No, the one that Daddy did love wearing.” It seemed that she got me correct finally. She said ' it is in our wardrobe. It is easy to find it, go and get it and then come here quickly.'

I have not been home for more than five years. Once I opened the door, and walked to my daddy’s bedroom, I saw there was a DVD player and his Cantonese Opera DVDs. I remembered that Daddy once asked me to help him choose one of them. However, I have just picked one of them up so randomly without further asking which one he liked the most.

When I arrived at the hospital, I saw my daddy’s dead body lying in the room. Looking at his tiny body and pale face, my eyes were filled with tears, trickling down my cheeks, and soon they were running off the tip of my nose. I asked ' Mom, can you do me a favor? It is so sorry that I can't say goodbye to Daddy. However, I want him to know that we do love him and miss him. If Daddy wears this suit, I think he will look handsome, confident, and feel good in the heaven even if we don't have a chance to see his lovely smiling face again anymore now. I want him to know that I wish he will be alright and be happier in another world.

Reviews

[KWP]

This a lovely and emotive story. You have managed to engage the emotions of the narrator very well indeed. There are some minor language issues, but I won't bother commenting on them.

Be careful of using too many pro-nouns and be careful of telling not showing ... for example 'I could not believe what I saw!' this is a prime example of 'telling' the reader will not be engaged for too long if you tell rather than show. Remember to use all of the senses when creating scenes , smell, touch, hearing, taste. How did the expensive bag feel in her hands? When she saw her mother was there a smell that reminded her of her childhood? This will make the reader feel like they are there with your narrator.

I like this story very much, as sad as it is. A great reminder that our parents are always there and sometimes they need us as much as we need them.

Great work XX

[Maggie Mak]

Thank you so much. I think the grammar suggestions are very useful. I will work hard on it and read more to improve. Thank you so much again and Merry Christmas ! !

[Maggie Mak]

And the writing skills suggestio ns are also useful 😃😃😃😃😃😃 thank you spending your time to read. Yea parents are always there