Yes. Our love shall forever shine

To the days of long ago. A co-write with Patches

By the soft, the golden glow of candlelight
much like the amber in her eyes.
I take quill in hand, write something she shall not see.
Coward that I am.
I shall write of her eyes tonight.
those beautiful orbs, the windows
through which I catch glimpses of her soul.

Or perhaps her hair; beautiful.
blue-black the color of a clean midnight sky.
With wind-tossed stars, like sequins' like rhinestones
nestled there. Her skin like milk, her throat so swan-like?
It matters little for only in my writes do I possess her.
It is my words she loves, not myself, with this misshapen protuberance!
I am merely a relative, a distance cousin, a playmate from our childhood in Bergerac

He comes this morns light.
I am told I must talk with him even though I have not seen hide nor hair of him since a year
My heart quickens, yet I refuse to let it still my thoughts.
Fear holds me prisoner at this moment, for none other would know of this feeling I have
This wanting I carry within my very breast.
I can not name it, for even I have no earthly idea on what ails me so.
Do I dare give a name for such an ailment?

Noise from below tells me of their arrival.
I run to the window and peek out, my eyes watching as he descends from the carriage.
A small flutter deep within springs forth.
Need I say why, or better yet, for who, this feeling falls upon?
The one who has stolen my heart, my very soul, so long ago..
Yet I stay silent. My lips shall never speak of his name.
For he sees me as only a child in appearance. Of a distant playmate of years from past.

It has been a year or more since last I spoke with her, she was, if I remember, almost seventeen then no, eighteen yes, eighteen
two years my junior. She was quiet the heart taker then, {he smiles} she attempted to take mine, not knowing she had it already.
Is she, I wonder, the same innocent little coquette? The girl who stole my heart at ten and has held it ever since.
What could she possibly want of me, a rough soldier? She cannot suspect that I love...
How deeply I love... She is a Precious, a poetry lover, thrilling at the sound and meaning of fine words. It is the thought of love
that she loves. The dream, not the reality, what can she know of loves reality? The unwonted desire that love engenders in the heart
It is love that she adores, not the emotion, that to her is a mystery. It is the mystique that thrills her not the reality.

Still, I will play her game, she may ask of me what she will, I will look upon her with a heart so full of love, that she cannot help but know, in her heart, how I feel. I will not speak to her of love.
I will let my eyes speak for me, my tongue will remain mute, for if I speak with a heart so full she will look upon my face and laugh, I could not bear that. She would laugh and I would lose her. And that, that would be terrible I would rather death than loss of her, for to die is but a little thing--- but to lose her... No I would lose my life, my very soul before I would lose her!
I remember down by the pond at Bergerac, we would play "grown-up" I was her swain, begging for a kiss, a token to bring away with me.
She would demure, refuse I would cajol. at last she would agree, when we ducked behind the bull rushes, I slipped and fell into the pond!

I watch as they leave the carriage. My eyes seeing just one. Him.. Oh how he plays with my senses.. My very being as if a toy.
Yet silent I am. Like as a mute. Deaf to my own musings of late. Only memory reminds of our first and last kiss. I smile in memory of his falling into the pond. His embarrassment showing on his face as my laughter sounded out. It was then I had fallen under his spell. The look in his eyes. Gentle... Kind...
Hurrying to the mirror I quickly pinch my cheeks to add color to their whiteness. My heart beats so. Like each breath shall be my last, I feel the pounding deep inside me.
Holding my breath, I eye myself and turn slowly. Twirling round and round. Like in my dreams I hold each night. Of his arms holding me as we dance to the strains of the softest sounding music being played. Oh how magnificent we look.
As we glide across the dance floor, my skirts engulfing his form close to me..

Voices below tell me they are ready. Taking a deep breath I swiftly leave my room and head for the staircase.
Laughter ringing out meets me as I am about to enter the parlor. The first person I see is my Aunt Marie.
She is more beautiful than I remember,. Tall, regal, her blonde hair pilled high atop her swan-like neck. Shoulders alabaster against the deep blue of her riding outfit.
She holds out her hand and meets me halfway. Her arms wrapping around me softly. I smell her perfume and close my eyes. Lilac.
Then comes Uncle Stephan. Tall, handsome, and a gentleman who many adore. I smile and curtsy and as I turn slowly I see him.
He is standing quietly to the side. His face turned ever so slightly, away from me. As if he is staring out towards the window.
I hear the rustle of my skirts as I walk towards where he stands .Slowly I bow my head and then lift my eyes upwards, seeing his own watching me.

My eyes water! My tongue cleaves to the roof of my mouth! What angel is this? What Goddess--- surely not little Madeleine! This is not the little innocent coquette who stole my heart ten years ago! My Roxane? What eyes, I cannot look into them! the glory of her shines through blinding me! Her beauty--- would be the envy of Helen, her sensuality surpasses Cleopatra's! Yet she is unaware, she is oblivious to her effect on me... She walks in beauty---a flower of innocence--- a lady--- unmindful of her charm!
"Mademoiselle--- charmed", I manage to blurt out. "fool, dolt, idiot!" I think to myself, you have lost your wits--- pah--- even that fool, Christian, could do better."
"My dear niece, how gracious of you to join us on our jaunt to Bergerac, we. your cousin, your aunt and I are overjoyed."

"See dolt, even her uncle is more eloquent" I bow, sweeping the floor with my hat, "Roxane," I say,
lost in her eyes, "lovely you have grown,
the rose droops, the blossom pales the very birds sing arias of rapture when gazing upon you. Has it been a year already---
that long since I have had the privilege of beholding your beauty?
I'll wager next year's pay that all the swains in Paris are beating at your door." She says nothing, only looks at me, is she laughing at my poor big devil of a nose?
Confused, I take her hand and dare to kiss her palm!

What is this feeling within, I am breathless! My heart is beating so.. I am in the presence of one who has stormed my dreams for many a year. I watch as he speaks, yet all I can see is his mouth move. No words pass by my ears. Flushed, I take out my fan and with a snap of the wrist, I am slowly waving it across my form. Oh how he moves me! My very being on fire, yet I must be silent. Instead I merely smile and give a slight curtsy.
He knows! As I slowly look up, I see his eyes staring at me. Oh the pain of it! They are boring into my very form. This man, this person, who I have known most of my childhood days, is standing in front of me and oh the thoughts that run by my mind.
Hush! I chastise my wandering thoughts. Forcing my eyes to look away, I smile at my aunt.

I move across the room to where she is standing. But not before I feel my hand suddenly taken. I look down in time to see Cyrano put his lips upon my wrist. The feeling of his mouth sends tingles up and down my arm. Like a lightening bolt! Gasping softly, I look into his eyes and for those few moments I let myself the pleasure of seeing into the very depth of his beautiful brown eyes. My heart flutters, then skips a beat. Oh the wonder of it! What magical spell does he possess over me? For this I question of myself.
I feel my feet move, my body slowly turning and walking across the room. Yet my thoughts are still with him. His lips upon my wrist. The feeling so divine that I feel faint.
Tears slowly form and I blink swiftly.. Oh my heart, love me, I beg deep within..

I look on the carriage waiting below, and catch Roxane's reflection in the window glass, she is whispering to her aunt. They both turn in my direction, my back toward them, they cannot know that I see their reflection. Her Aunt Marie, my aunt taller than Roxane, more statuesque, a classic beauty in her own right. But Roxane, petite, perfect in proportion. her dark hair sending diamonds of sunlight bouncing from the window into my eyes--- What's this? a tear, is that a tear in her reflected eye? What have I done? No, she smiles at my back. If only I had the courage to face her as I've faced so many enemies. She is no enemy, she is my love, that is why I fear to face her,my continence may disgust her!

"My own, my dearly beloved, my heart so heavy with love, I have not told--- Will I die without telling? After today, after Bergerac, shall ever my eyes drink the sight of you like wine? Will they ever again, with a look that is a kiss follow the sweet grace of you? Can I bear to live in this world knowing you are here, yet hold my tongue, keep silent til eternity? No, I cannot, it is better that you know, it is better that I speak then it shall be resolved one way or the other. Let me look at you with a courage born of desire, let me speak, so that you may understand, so that you know my heart. God grant me eloquence so that I may speak with you tonight of love, at Bergerac where this took root, I shall ask for your hand!"

I have been told of our going back to Bergerac, Oh how can I act like there are non memories there? Nothing that happened between he and I? I listen as my aunt speaks, her voice sounding forth to my ears, yet I am lost. Instead I stare at his back.. He sits straight, his posture perfect. Like him! Can he not see my love? My feelings? For my eyes do not tell a lie, they are open when I look upon him.
A soft sigh leave me. Tears come swiftly for the pain I hold deep within. I close them quickly, for fear. He does not care for me! He thinks me a child. A nuisance of sorts. To him I am just a young girl.. Oh love me, I cry out in silence. My lips quiver so, for just one kiss. Like the one we had shared at the pond so long ago. Oh the memories I have taken with me. Each night remembering their softness, the slight quiver of his loving lips that softly touched mine.

The carriage is slowing. I feel the movement and straighten my shoulders. 'Be strong', I tell myself. I take the tissue from my sleeve and dab at my eyes while no one is looking. Never have I felt this, this pain. Strong enough to make me feel ligh-headed. His nearness has me in his spell. I beg him to turn his face towards me. Every ounce of energy inside me burst forth. Then the doors open, I look up and he is there. His hand held out for mine to take it. Gently I gather my dress and with my hand in his, descend from the carriage.
The warm feeling spirals up my arm. Gasping, I look at him and his eyes are holding mine. Deep, dark, penetrating. There is something hidden there. We stare, him and I. Alone for that simple moment. Then he looks away. I cry inside. Am I so hideous, he can not stare at me? Oh love! Turn to me once more, I beg.. Yet he moves on towards the large doors that stood open.

Shown to our rooms, I quickly took out my outfit for the ball. Golden threads, sparkling like diamonds, ruining through the blackest of night, of my velvet gown. Dinner was a dream, one I went through in slow motion. My mind on only one in the room. He sat across from me, my eyes looking towards him, yet his still moving about as I were not there. 'Yet not tonight' I swore with all inside me. 'Tonight he will notice me' I silently made a promise that I was sure to keep. Tonight he would know of my love and child be damned, he would see how much woman I was!

The hour had arrived. The soft strains of music drifted up toward the rooms. I hurriedly dressed. My hair was piled high into a cascading bun by one of the maids. A long curl hung loose and laid upon my shoulder.. I looked in the mirror and saw someone I did not recognize. A woman who was beautiful, no longer a child.. The darkness of the dress accented my white skin. The front was low, and the gold thread sparkled throughout, making it glitter with every turn.. My shoulders were bare, for the dress hung low across each one. On them I had dusted a hint of gold glitter, and in my hair, the maid had added a slight touch of the palest gold to add to the mystique..I stared at myself one more time and smiled.. My Aunt had given me some color to add to my cheeks and lips.. I was ready!

I I heard all the guest arrive, then slowly made my way out of my room. My gloved hand grasping the banister as I made my way downstairs.. The first person I saw was my Uncle Stephan. His eyes opened wide in disbelief. 'Oh my Lord! My sweet one.' He came towards me with a smile. 'You look beautiful!' I smiled back and gave a wide curtsy. "Thank you Uncle.' By then my Aunt Marie was standing near to him. Her smile telling me she was pleased at the picture I made.. "My dear, you could never look lovelier.' She then shoos her husband off and drags me to where her son is standing. I felt faint, yet tried hard to show all was well. Yet when we were standing there finally and he looked up with those eyes and stared at me, I knew I could no longer pretend. I loved him!
First I was shocked, then it slowly hit me. I was in love with him all this time! From our days at Bergerac! from our first kiss by the pond! A smile lit my face.. Then.. I saw his eyes widen, then slowly they closed.. Seconds later he opened them, and I felt my breath catch ever so slightly.

His eyes were smiling! Oh let it be so! let my eyes deceive me not.. My whole world looked bright. I sent forth a giggle without realizing it.. Then I heard the sweetest of sounds. He laughed! I looked around quickly, my eyes seeing all the people dressed in their finery. The floor for dancing. The food layed out just so.
Then I looked back at him. He offered his arm at that moment. Before I could think, I took it. 'May we walk Mon Chere?' I smiled in answer, and soon we were walking out towards the veranda.. The night air was crisp, teasing my flesh with its soft touch. the stars seemed to be shining down on us, for their brightness was magical..I took in a deep breath, the sensation of all making me feel slightly giddy.. 'I was in love!' I felt like screaming it across the whole room full of people..
He turned me then. I watched his eyes look into mine for the longest while..

Is it so? Does my eyes deceive me? For if I didn't know any better I would swear.... No, it can not be! She can not possibly love me. Me with my face as such, I am hideous to all, especially one as beautiful as she. My lovely Roxane! Yet. I see in her eyes this look. Oh say it is so! is this the look I have dreamed of for many a year? the look that haunted me through my darkest hours? My heart swelled. My eyes widened. I started to speak. Yet my voice was silent. "Dolt! See what she makes you feel? Like an imbecile! A fool, which is what you are.. She can never love one as you! I chastise myself for my foolish thoughts.. How I, Cyrano, could even think one as beautiful as my Roxane could ever feel anything for me except kindness. Love! Fool! Never!!!
Not one as she. Who can have half the men at her side this very moment. I saw how the others had their eyes trained on her as we walked out the french doors. Fool I am not! Nor blind!

My smile slowly started to leave my lips as I saw him start to pull away. His eyes became distant again. I felt his love, I know I did! I argued with myself. No! I would not let him get away again! Never!!! Grabbing his arm as he started to move us, I turned him towards me again. I would hold my tongue no longer. To damn with all! I shall speak my piece and get it done. Throw all to the wind. I will tell him how I feel, have felt, for so long. If he laughs, turns away, so be it. Yet I must do this.. I can not go on the way I have for all these years
"Look at me Cyrano', I whispered softly. I felt his arm tighten in my hand. Then knew. He did love me! My strength tightened. My words would not be stopped now. "Cyrano I have something to say. Something I have wanted to say for such a long time'....

I looked upon her face. My love, my one and only! Could it be? I was so beside myself I could not think. In my pocket I felt the small black box I had brought with me.. The ring.. Yes it is now or never, I tell myself. For the first time I knew there was no turning back. I must do this. In my heart I felt it. Slowly I took the ring box out and with shaky hands, opened it. The bright sparkle of the diamond hit my eyes. I felt like a school boy suddenly. My fear took over. it was all I could do to stand there, the ring box in my hand, my heart in the other! Slowly I turned towards her.. I forced myself to hold the box out, but out of habit, held my face away..

A soft hand on my chin turned my face towards her. I felt my body jerk at her touch. I looked at her and saw the look in her eyes. For the first time I did not look away. I just stared at her beauty. This woman I loved, adored from afar, for so long, now who stood before me. I suddenly was not afraid. I was not ashamed of my nose, my hideous face. For she made me feel as handsome as any man there..
I held the ring box out, slowly moving it towards her. The with a gentle sweep, I felt myself kneel to one knee. My head bent down as I stared at her small black Velvet slippers.
'Roxane, I must come forth with the truth, of my feelings for you. Feelings that I have held for many a year." I looked up at her then. Her eyes held tears.. Could I have been wrong? I suddenly chastised myself.. Before I could rise, she held my arm and stopped me.

'My dear Cyrano, do you have any idea how long I have waited for you to talk with me? Please say what is on your thoughts?' Her voice was soft as the wind.

I looked up at her and her smile made my feeling's come rushing forth that I held pent up for so long. "I love you my dear. I have loved you since the beginning of time. For as long as I can remember. From the moment of our first kiss by the pond." My eyes swept the area leading towards the pond where we played as children.. I looked at the box, and my nerve became stronger. Taking a deep breath I blurted out my question...

"May I have your hand in marriage, my love?'" I said it! My hand trembled, but not as bad as i thought it would.

Oh my heart!! I clapped my hands together and with a gay laugh, pulled him up from his knee. His eyes now looked into mine. I finally showed what they held for so long. Seeing his own widen, then the same look coming forth, I knew then..
I had found my love!!

"Oh yes my love. For the same as I. I have loved you forever. From the moment we first kissed and forever more". Before he could say another word, I held out my hand. I watched his hand tremble slightly as he slowly slipped the ring on my finger. The diamonds sparkled like the stars above. Oh I have never felt such joy. Such wondrous magic! My heart felt alive, full, and so in love!!

'Should we go in and tell the others?" I heard him ask softly.

I smiled at his beautiful face, and nodded in agreement. 'Yes my love, but not before this.. I moved closer to him and putting my arms around his neck, our lips met for the second time since knowing one another.. I kissed him with all I felt, all the love in my heart, and I felt him do the same.. The stars, our only witnesses to our love.. I was no longer worried about the others. Just my love and I. There was always time enough to let the others know of our love. For now it was just the two of us. just as it always should have been from the beginning of time..

As it shall always be forever...



"Notre amour est toujours briller"......


(Yes. Our love shall forever shine)


(Magdelena (MoonStar) in Blue......)

(Patches.. (Cyrille) in Black....)

Author's Note

Thank you Patches for lending your wonderful pen to mine with this write. I did so enjoy the experience.

Mags xx

Reviews

[Coyote Poetry]

The story like a trip to a better time. The characters were entertaining. The events described with detail to make them come alive. I like the description of the character and their emotions. Kind and sweet words made this a pleasure to be able to read. Thank you for the outstanding story.
Coyote

[E.H. Monroe]

I almost want the beginning to be an invocation of the muses. The perfect description of the Greek like white of the skin, curved swan like neck. Either we have an animal fettish or the thrill of getting an idea comes on like a song

After handling the second, I started to think it was two star crossed lovers in wait of meeting.
When it became evident that it was a poetic, less prose back and forth it had the audience switching places with the characters, taking on both genders. An interesting way to get a point across.

“Hurrying to the mirror I quickly pinch my cheeks to add color to their whiteness. “-how f*****g adorable in an Elizabethan way.
The unanswered love actually had me stop reading for a bit. To dig this deep into the unchecked emotions of another almost feels like a pornographic peepshow, just based in heart and less hard-ons. I would have almost rather to do the entire story in internal dialogue. Instead of having the people speak have every bit appear in the heads of others. AND if it was..you did a phenomenal job of masking it.

“The night air was crisp, teasing my flesh with its soft touch.” This is romance novel description gone right.
I was in the middle of a soap opera, with a little penthouse mixed in. And the challenge of the personal switch worked the entire way. Telling a story through eyes and not mouths depends on the authors grip on detail. You got it.

Excellent work.

[Patches I'm not so new..]

My dearTwin I am overjoyed I am estatic to see that this has been posted here
without your wonderful sense of the original story this would have been difficult but you made it into a labor of love. I truly was in awe as to the way you turned the story from the original ending to the one in this retelling.
You are without a doubt the best "story teller" in my world. Kudos to you dearest Gumba my world is a brighter place because of you.
Patches XX and a great big HUG