Firefly

We are too free. My love will not fit in a glass jar. I took the words that spilled over and with them I wrote you this.

I have always wanted to be your firefly

Extract my glowing heart from its ribcage, tie it with ribbon, and place it in a glass jar on your bedside table.

I could be your nightlight

If all the city lights flickered out we'd illuminate the darkest most narrow of streets, I want to be the searchlight that cuts through the hurricane, guiding you home. 

My hands shine in the darkness for all the times your fingertips have brushed mine

You stole radiance from brightest star in the sky and poured it into my bloodstream and I haven't been the same since 

Sometimes, although it is invisible on the surface

I always feel its warmth on the inside

Which explains why I've begun to reconcile my peace with the night

But the truth is 

I'm not your firefly 

No matter how much I try 

My flesh and faulty heart are sewn with the thread of human fragility 

I turn on lamps in the dark with hands that tremor uncertainly

I cannot stand the confines of a glass prison 

And while fireflies dance alone out of reach

Producers of their own light

I am always crumbling into your arms 

Feeding off of your relentless energy

I don't hold the light of my love neatly in my hands

It spills through the cracks of my skin and stains everything it reaches 

And there are days when the dizzying heights of the early morning sky choke my attempts to bring you the constellations

And there are other days still when I try to be your fire and I burn you

But you are good at painting with the things I spill 

And crafting art out of the metal and dust from failed stars I've tried to forge in your image

So there is only one thing I know anymore

I may not be your firefly

But we still glow