Sleepless My Soul Is Torn

A poem...

My breath forms

The ghost of my soul

In a raspy cloud of steam.

It twists, deforms

Like smoke from the coal

Burning inside of me.

 

I pull my coat tight

Close around my shoulders

To keep myself warm.

But the winter night

Only gets colder

And I feel my soul torn.

 

Between concrete pavements

And accusatory statements.

Whispered words of love,

Shouted out hate.

Is it fate?

It must be,

-with how often I find myself in this state.

 

Sleepless, insomniac.

Unable to dream a better life,

when its dreams that I lack.

 

I'm unable to grasp time,

Just the endless count of footsteps.

Towards a place I'll never find,

A dream I've never slept.

 

Is the cold in my mind?

Is the winter in my heart?

Because illusion and reality,

Are hard to tell apart.

 

Its the winter that precedes

All the dying things,

The stopping of the clock.

To numb my soul,

Before the burning coals

Of my self-inflicted Ragnarok.

 

And as the birds sing,

the spring sun is warm.

But I walk upon a wintry street,

Sleepless, my mind is torn.

Author's Note

Will probably do some more work on this later. Kind of just typed it all up, so the meter is probably off and could use a bit of polish. Its a poem that's a bit about depression and insomnia, which I had big problem with in my past.

Reviews

[Damien Davison]

I thoroughly enjoyed this writing, I connected to it

`Is the cold in my mind?
Is the winter in my heart?
Because illusion and reality,
Are hard to tell apart.`

This part really plucked a string. I always felt like I was in a cold hell in my mind. And illusion and reality I had a hard time differentiating before... Very great write.

[MachinaWriter]

Thank you. Writing those lines really stuck out to me, as well, so I'm glad to see they affected someone else just as strongly. I really apprecite the review and would love to see your thoughts on some of my other work Once again, thank you for taking the time to read this ^^

[Ina Waltz]

"Because illusion and reality,
Are hard to tell apart."
I find it as a great description of what depression brings to a life of an individual, confusion and battle between two sides of your mind- the reality which tells you to get well and illusion that tells you to give in.
A powerful piece that I can connect to.

[MachinaWriter]

Thank you, I'm glad you got something from it. That's what makes writing these things worth it, so I really do thank you for that.

[eglantine]

LOVE that first stanza. Great imagery.

[MachinaWriter]

Yeah, I loved that line, as well. It came to mind as I was outside, smoking a cigarette. It was cold and I thought that my breath looked like my soul, escaping my body.

[de_maruf]

awesome

[Sirius King]

My breath forms
The ghost of my soul... great line

Is the cold in my mind?

Is the winter in my heart?

Because illusion and reality,

Are hard to tell apart.... i really like this stanza

...depression and sleepless nights are something i still deal with from time to time
(less now than before)

very relate-able write

[Apatheia]

I suppose, like everyone else, I love the lines "Because illusion and reality,/ Are hard to tell apart." I love how well you described this. You can really feel your emotions in it and picture everything you're describing. Well done, dear. :)

[Kelsey]

This is one of my favorite pieces I've ever read on this site, by far. The flow is wonderful, the word choice is great, and the story is amazing. Very well told, and very nicely done.

[Hadewijch Lady of the N..]

lovely work!

[MachinaWriter]

Thank you ^^ I'm glad you enjoyed it. Feel free to look at some of my other works, I'd love to hear what you think of them. If not, then once again I appreciate you taking the time to read this and leave a comment ^^

[Hadewijch Lady of the North]

I will surely read more of your work! and review it. If you have the time I would appreciate you reviewing mine. :)

May the Northern wind guide you,

Hadewijch

[MachinaWriter]

I'll definitely take a look at your stuff ^^ And I always leave comments. Once again, thank you.