Mourn

 

 

 

The heart scattered with wings that never flew

And dreams laid waste and happiness too few

The wind lashes and calls in a wash of broken rain

All you grasp in finger loads are hung hours of pain

 

If I could see the moment when it all went wrong

If I could fix and tune the melody and the song

 If the flowering rose stood whole in storms eye

Dreams could weather typhoons and knots untie

 

The world be like the fountains endless spring

Your heart and mine delicately on the wing

And every bare branch burnt and hung out to dry

Would spurt in growth flower and forever fly

 

So when autumn rusts in all its glory appear

You would be at one with courage conquering fear

Yet now it is the darkness creeps and shadows the door

My heart lay bare wasted and broken to the core

 

Now that the angels of mercy from the heart is gone

Here on this bloody cross here lies a life to mourn

 

Reviews

[Jimmy Yetts]

Typically gorgeous work.
A stunning and meaningful poem!
Kudos!

[MOON]

Thank you Jimmy , will stop by soon.

[DrD]

I love the delicacy of this work, the sensitivity and lamentation. Excellent metaphor and word seleciton. All the elements to be a marvelous write.

[MOON]

Thanks Dr D for gracing my page will return the favour ,take care!

[ZeniaK]

The last two lines seemed to echo "prophecy!" at me. They seemed wonderfully written, ominous, and beautiful all at the same time. Now THIS is talent.

[MOON]

Thanks so much for reviewing my writings , appreciate your comments, take care!

[...]

Wow, Moon, this is sooo full and eloquent and achingly bleeding.

[MOON]

Thanks Lynn, I love your reviews. Take care my friend!

[MsJewel]

Your words are sad and yet there is beauty here... The first verse is my favorite
The heart scattered with wings that never flew...absolutely stunning.

I could feel the emotion in this graceful pen...truly you have touched my heart.

:) Julie

[MOON]

Thank you so much for this lovely review, take care.

[J]

oh my, you have some gorgeous lines here -- anguish within beautiful words put together with such skill and grace. very well done.

[MOON]

Thank you J so appreciate your review, take care.

[kublakhan27]

This was in my library after the first stanza. It's one of the best poems I've ever read on this theme anywhere. Needless to say, it's a truly universal theme, but it takes an incredible artist to articulate it with such a high level of eloquence and haunting beauty. Beyond that, I've been left speechless by the power of this piece. My new favourite from your cataogue...awesome work my friend.

[MOON]

Thank you my dear , dear friend.

[kublakhan27]

Always a pleasure Moon^^

[writing mojo]

This piece is very moving and can each section can be broken up into like the lines "Dreams could weather typhoons and knots untie The world be like the fountains endless spring Your heart and mine delicately on the wing And every bare branch burnt and hung out to dry Would spurt in growth flower and forever fly"...Wow these are absolutely brilliant skills in this asthmatic breath taking measure. Your pain is reverberating throughout the universal language of love and loss...amazing piece moon

[MOON]

Thank you so much , I so appreciate your comments.

[John]

There is pain and loss expressed. I like the way the poem is presented - the font you use and the picture at the top. They add a lot to the pleasure of experiencing this piece.

[MOON]

Thanks John for stopping by, take care.