Three
A Poem by
Miki
One, Two, One, Two.
All the clocks strike three.
Ring Ring, Ring Ring.
All the clocks shall chime.
One,
Two, One, Two.
All
the clocks strike three.
Ring
Ring, Ring Ring.
All
the clocks shall chime.
The
people drift,
From
far and near,
As
the train approaches.
Hustle
and bustle,
Onto
your train.
You
eagerly await,
For
the time it arrives.
Three
is nearing,
Can't
you see?
Three
was my death.
No
one knows,
No
one cares.
So
I shall sing,
Till
the end of time,
Of
the cursed time: three.
One,
Two, One, Two.
All
the clocks strike three.
Ring
Ring, Ring Ring.
All
the clocks shall chime.
If
only you would look,
Under
the train;
Where
that fateful event,
Took
place.
Three.
I
met my demise,
Faced
it head on.
It
wasn't pleasant,
It
wasn't painless.
One,
Two, One, Two.
All
the clocks strike three.
Ring
Ring, Ring Ring.
All
the clocks shall chime.
This
cursed time of three,
Those
cursed forgetful mortals.
All
those who have forgotten,
I
haven't forgiven .
© 2011 Miki
Author's Note
This is a poem I wrote from the point of view of a ghost that died at a train station; he was hit by a train and died at three o'clock.
I'm open to criticism; let me know what you think of the poem. Please point out any errors and let me know how I could change it to make it better. :)
-Mikayla W.
Reviews
I liked this poem. It was dreary and daunting, and the fact that it didn't rhyme gave it a sort of shaken meter. I don't think you should change anything, honestly. The ghost feels out of place, the lines don't rhyme or really fit in a uniform manner, it's cohesive in that way.
Well done.
Posted 12 Years Ago
Hmm, it's intruiging and spooky. It sounds like it came from a slightly deranged person, which I like :D
Great job!
Posted 12 Years Ago
Hmm, it's intruiging and spooky. It sounds like it came from a slightly deranged person, which I like :D
Great job!
wow this is amazing
i love this!
Posted 12 Years Ago
wow this is amazing
i love this!
I liked this. Oddly, enough. It's different from my usual style! Bravo.
Wasn't particularly " rhymey" but it was intriguing. Some of the lines just seemed... a bit out of place.
* 85 *
Posted 12 Years Ago
I liked this. Oddly, enough. It's different from my usual style! Bravo.
Wasn't particularly " rhymey" but it was intriguing. Some of the lines just seemed... a bit out of place.
* 85 *
very good . i like the last part --This cursed time of three,
Those cursed forgetful mortals.
All those who have forgotten,
I haven't forgiven.
Posted 12 Years Ago
very good . i like the last part --This cursed time of three,
Those cursed forgetful mortals.
All those who have forgotten,
I haven't forgiven.
Stats
311 Views
5 Reviews
Added on November 9, 2011
Last Updated on November 9, 2011
Tags:
Three ,
Clocks ,
Chime ,
Ring ,
One ,
Two ,
Demise ,
Death ,
Forgiven ,
Forget ,
Ghosts.
Author
Miki Mount Vernon, WA
About
Hi. :)
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