shadow on me

it is not the series of i saw her the series will come soon

my heart is teased
go here from there
some time it mickle
other moment go with tear
a black heart make a shadow
make it as she had
i am tearing for what
don't i think self as bad
it look toward boundless sky
with a long breath
it my heart say
i got the feeling hearth

Author's Note

straightly said

Reviews

[Katherine Enma Pineappl..]

I'm not all too clear on what my initial reaction is when I read this and honestly I read the poem again and again before I can formulate a comprehensive review. It's deep, intense and contains a touch of human nature that pulls it down to earth.

Good write

[Coyote Poetry]

The heart is a tender organ. Can be broken and healed with words and actions. There is darkness and love in all of us. A wise person try to be kind. Darkness lead to no-where. Thank you for sharing the excellent poetry.
Coyote

[de_maruf]

thanks

[khalid]

very nicely written but i think it is better if you review it after you have straightly said it

[Bewitching Sensations]

very to the point..good

[Ees]

huh?
It felt like the words were all jumbled, the only lines I clearly understood were the first and the fifth.
I don't understand the use of the word "mickle." overall this left me quite confused.

[gombeggar]

i like this it is very plainly forward in it's feeling, not to say it lacks at all though

[Dayran]

The heart may bring to us an experience that is bigger than all else but it must rely on the mind for an orderly experience of it.

[Kiari Sabon]

it is a little hard to follow but it is also understood and the meaning is sadly beautiful

[Amanda J. S.]

I like it! It is really simple, but yet deep... Good job!

[de_maruf]

thanks

[Mark]

It's hard to understand, the way it runs together at sentence end/beginning... Kind of a stream of consciousness writing? I got some sort of longing, perhaps broken heart? but the 'boundless sky' reference seems to say it will be okay.

[de_maruf]

is it clear now?

[Mark]

a little bit :)