Explosion, Much?

i can't even explain this. however you see it.

February 11th, 2010

Feel the pulse of the hate in your head; feel the blood pour from the wounds in your soul; feel the scars of your past and accept the s**t that will inevitably come.
This is your life.
You will wake up and you will want to go right back to sleep, a slumber that will not end. You’ll ignore these longings and instead let your feet hit the floor you’ve so often fallen to agony and you’ll make the bed that’s drank your tears so many times.
You’ll choke down food you’d much rather dump down the sink and let yourself starve just like you think you deserve.
You’ll go out into a world that you secretly hate. You’ll feel shallow happiness and conjure smiles that you really do think reach your eyes. But they don’t.
You’ll hang around people that you force yourself to care about because you force yourself to believe they care about you. But they probably don’t.
You will be oblivious to all of these real emotions and memories and truths.
At least until you make it back to a place you call home but quite honestly can’t stand going back to.
It’s a place of pain and anger and yelling and hell for you.
Things don’t get better in the absent comfort of this place. You are harassed and beaten down with words and pressure and I

JUST WANT TO SCREAM;

      WANT TO DIE;

      WANT TO LIVE;

    I WANT TO BE FREE.

     Instead, I am me.

I’m happy and suicidal and defensive and disappointed and hurtful and sorry.

I AM NOT  WHO I AM.

Is that okay with you me?


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Author's Note

mmm?

Reviews

[Numb]

Mmm, to you?
Words cannot describe this... And I've been known to never shut up about the stupidest things. There was so much of... everything as I read this. Emotion, imagery of some sort, and other things I can't explain.
My head's in a - what's the word? - tizzy [not sure if that's right] because this kid who likes me just wouldn't leave me alone... He asked me out, I said no, so he decided to curse me out... -.-'

Sorry.

I have no reason to be bringing my life into this...
~N~