apologist

artwork by house of maria/maria oosthuizen

like time lapsed photography

the years have flown

days fell out of my pockets

leaving holes in my favorite jeans

and my heart

lyrics of old songs floated by

with some of the words missing

(then again words can weigh me down)

knowing salt water stings my eyes

i jump into the waves anyway

i'm shocked my cold heart is growing soft

till at the right angle of omissions and admissions

i become the apologist to myself

                                                                                                                                  

Reviews

[Sami Khalil]

Your poetry is always top-notch. It holds lots of meaning, imagery and truth. The heart is a well for many of our deep emotions. An apologist to the self is becoming so aware of things past, present. It is seeking forgiveness. A great healing process.

[Lydia Shutter]

thank you, Sami. So nice of you to go back in my archives to find this one. Lydi**

[Sami Khalil]

It is a pleasure. You are welcome Lydia.

[K writes]

This write is quite intriguing, we often look at what we have done in our past and wanting
to apologize to our self for what we are have done to our self. nicely expressed

[Lydia Shutter]

Kaykey, I so appreciate the time you took to review my words. Lydi**

[K writes]

not a problem

[Lorry]

I think of the word "Elegant" when I read your words Lydi, and yet again you don't let me down with this piece.
I hate to single out any part in particular, because they are all so... What's the word again... Elegant, but final line had me nodding head along with it like a... Well, nodding dog on the back space of a car. 😊
Some words missing from those songs, eh? Just do what I do, sing what you hear, like...
BAD moon rising has a line "there's a bad moon on the rise" but I prefer my own mishearing of "there's a bathroom on the right."
Or the jungle books Bear necessities becomes "the beans n Sausages"
Or even Bob Dylan's blowing in the wind's "the answer my friend, is blowin' in the wind" becomes "the ants are my friends, they're blowin' in the wind"
At worst, people hearing you will be open mouthed, wide eyed and their eyebrows will turn into question marks... Or just point and laugh. Or is that just me?
What were we talking about again? Oh yeah... We do that though, don't we? Even if we have nothing to apologise for (you, not me) we always do to ourselves, don't we?)
Ps... Would advise singing juggle balls this festive season though, especially if kids nearby 😉

[Lydia Shutter]

Lorry, thank you so much not only for the review, but for the laughs. Fluffing my hair here and thinking I am oh so elegant because Lorry says so....hmmmm....should I accept his opinion? Oh, nevermind! :) I appreciate the visit! Have a wonderful day. Lydi**

[John the Baptist]

There is something about autumn that leaves many of us pondering the passage of time (with the exception of the young). If a cold heart grows soft when contemplating the roads taken or not taken, that is a good sign. If more could become apologists for themselves, there would be less of the self flogging and bitterness that oppresses too many lives.

[Lydia Shutter]

You are so wise, John. Thank you for your lovely words. Lydi**

[jacob erin-cilberto]

and yet, do we really owe ourselves an apology for living life as we do?
We make decisions, we write what we write, our hearts learn, grow tougher, and then sometimes mellow again...the bottom line is that we do the best we can do.
and photography can be brush stroked to suit our guilt or forgiveness for ourselves.
Thinking of that salt water stinging the eyes...I remember swimming at Rye Beach...and that Salt Water that hurt my eyes...and the awful taste of it...
such depth to these words,
j.

[Lydia Shutter]

I appreciate your review, Jacob. Yes, we do the best we can with what life brings us. Lydi**

[emmajoy]

Oh yes, time changes the who we were, then we start turning into memories we didn't know we had made, shapes and thoughts we didn't know we had, plans we didn't know we were making! Life is for changing, tis experiencing; enables us to alter hair. shoes, attitude; suffering and pleasuring, learning and forgetting. There's doubt and often darkness inside.. but life decrees affinity to what is.. sometimes hidden.. apologists in the making. Do we, should we, refuse, deny or accept selves as apologists or.. go with what life means' How much do we accept or deny.. why?!

[Lydia Shutter]

That sounds like a subject for a doctorate thesis! My goodness, Emma, I just love your reviews. thank you so much. I hope all is well with you. Lydi**