i'll be yours

a love poem to start this holiday weekend

artwork by talantbek chekirov

i’ll hum you a song of red roses

when you’ve forgotten the song they sing

when silence invades your days

the velvet soft notes of each petal

will lead you to my whispered borders of love

 

i’ll hand you stars from the velvet sky

when darkness threatens

their gentle celestial illumination

will be your glimmer of sanguinity

 

i’ll be as comfortable as your worn out jeans

as formal as your tuxedo

and the symphonic reflections in the mirror of your mind

 

i’ll be the kiss you long for in the middle of the day

and the middle of the night

i’ll sweep the dust of your burdens into the great abyss

 

i’ll be yours

 

Reviews

[Lavi]

I like this writing a lot although I am curious as to the purpose of the = signs replacing the 's in your writing.
Favorite lines:
"i=ll be the kiss you long for in the middle of the day
and the middle of the night
i=ll sweep the dust of your burdens into the great abyss"
&
"i=ll hand you stars from the velvet sky
when darkness threatens
their gentle celestial illumination
will be your glimmer of sanguinity"

I've never seen a writing quite like this before and I enjoyed every word of it. Even with the peculiar placing of the equal signs. Surprisingly it doesn't break the flow of the poem.

[Lydia Shutter]

Seriously, I do not see the = that people are referring to....sorry. I will have to look at someone else's computer to check this out. I appreciate the visit. Lydi*

[Healing Star]

I don't See the i= either must be somethin' dicked up on her computer

[Lydia Shutter]

A lot of people saw it, but it was a glitch on the site.

[Healing Star]

oh ....... :)

[Lavi]

Ah, I've seen that once of twice. I never would've guessed it though - thanks for letting us know.

[sette]

as always creatively expressed

[Lydia Shutter]

Thank you, Sette. Lydi**

[Lorry]

Beautifully captured Lydi. All giving, all consuming love, that uses all the senses and paints such a beautiful scene in the readers mind.

[Lydia Shutter]

Thank you very much, Lorry. Lydi**

[θεά]

I wish the = sign didn't get in the way of the the rightful apostrophes, but that is a minor nitpick. Overall what a tender, loving expression of love and affection. Like a soft, red rose' petal your writing was tender and beautiful.

[Lydia Shutter]

Mallika, I don't see any = sign in my poem....you do? How strange. Thank you for the review. Lydi**

[John the Baptist]

You sound like an American version of Light. Read some of her work and tell me if you agree. Sensual and spiritual simultaneously. Very nice.

[Lydia Shutter]

I appreciate the review. I am not sure I know who light is....can you send me her link? I have been writing for over 50 years....perhaps she is a version of me.

[Lavi]

I apologize in advance for this but when you said "an American version of Light" I pictured Light from Death Note and winced so badly and then I saw the 'her' in the rest of your sentence. Anyways, don't mind me and my sleep-deprived, misreading self. I am curious as to who this Light is though now.

[Lydia Shutter]

I have never heard of "Death Note"....sorry. I thought you were referring to a poet on WC.

[John the Baptist]

I'm confused.

[Lydia Shutter]

No more than I am.....

[John the Baptist]

I have been in touch with Light and she says she has reviewed your work before.

[Lydia Shutter]

And I have reviewed hers...but what does Death Note have to do with anything?

[Lavi]

I don't remember, I was a bit sleep deprived when I was last on here. I think it was because seeing the word Light made me think of the man who wanted to be a god at whatever the cost but not sure where I was going with it. Haha, awkward.