an open ended poem

an open ended poem beckons

vagrant syllables queue up to be chosen

knowing their chances

of immortality and fame

lie just beyond the next couplet

 

it’s a sign of the times i tell ya

financial assets be damned

pages have been blank before

all that really matters now is rememberin’

it ain't worth a dime

if it ain't got that rhyme

 

words ride on roller skates

to join the competition

damn right they “got” ambition

struggling for special position

wanna be in that golden edition

  

stick a silk flower in that lapel baby

the rain “don’t” matter today

the shortest distance between two points

is that unwritten line

the one i am gonna complete

 

Reviews

[barleygirl]

It's nice to read something from you that has a more straightforward, down-to-earth, & slightly abrasive message, rather than your usual smooth flowing verse! *wink! wink!* I can relate to so many of your sentiments here, especially the first stanza, which is so delightful & hopeful. I love the extended rhyme over 4 lines in stanza 3. And I love the sassy tone of the first 2 lines in stanza 4, which convey the grit & determination of tackling a stubborn poem that needs finishing!

[Lydia Shutter]

So glad you could relate, Margie. Yea, I can be abrasive...ask anyone who has gotten on my bad side! :) I appreciate your review. Lydi**

[Manu]

What a master piece this poem is !
A lovely poem that speaks to you. This one is like a puzzle that is getting unraveled by itself.
These are my favorite lines:
it’s a sign of the times i tell ya
financial assets be damned
pages have been blank before
all that really matters now is rememberin’
it ain't worth a dime
if it ain't got that rhyme
Brilliant poem, Lydi :-)
Never keep your pen down.
You are amongst my favorite writers on this cafe.
Keep inspiring. *Manasvini*

[Lydia Shutter]

Thank you so much for this review, Manasvini. I appreciate you. Lydi**

[Bala Gorthi]

Excellent Lydia! What a write!
And the imagery and the pace you set up in the third stanza is awesome.
Heart goes thump, thump, thump. All the financial assets reduced dime.. Today is the day of your rocking words. Just complete the last unwritten line, your audience is waiting in standing ovation...
Thank you for this amazing craft..

[Lydia Shutter]

Thank you, Bala. Lovely review. Lydi**

[Patricia Wedel]

dear Lydi... there is no giving up... the
prize is still within reach... The hallelujah's are still sung and the sun rises and sets on ambition without condition. Amen... truly, Pat

[Lydia Shutter]

I always enjoy your reviews, Pat. Thank you so much. Lydi**

[Papaya]

Lydi, this is awesome. It feels a bit bad a*s and like you're busting out some slam rap lyrics. To me this feels like you're flipping the finger at the pressure to keep up with Jones' and doing it your way.

[Lydia Shutter]

[Lyn Anderson]

So very true. Always a struggle to keep up, but to what end? We doubt ourselves at times and still go forward because it's the only thing we know how to do.

[Lydia Shutter]

You know it, KL! Thanks so much for the review. Lydi**

[emmajoy]

You do it every time.. drag my socks off.. (Peruvian slipper sox today!) Your poem sings here, meter extraordinary.. has a bounce to it.. as well, of course, of the theme, start to finish. Seems we have to weigh up our intentions when it comes to poetry these days.. better the obvious word even if not entirely elegantly dressed, maybe.

Yet another glorious piece of writing, yet another inspiration... i so admire your work.. so there!

[Lydia Shutter]

Wouldn't want those tootsies to be cold! Put your socks back on, Emma! :) Glad you liked the rhythm of my words in this one. I admire your work as well....we are fortunate! Thank you so much, Emma. Lydi**

[emmajoy]

Laughing.. sox back on, promise. Was Spring warm yesterday, late Autumn today, but, Winter sliding towards us for tomorrow. (You)

[Ken Simm.]

Superb irony is this Lydi. Could be better described as a song rather than a poem. Steeped in wit. Funny but also wise.

[Lydia Shutter]

Yea, I was sorta kinda writing in a rhythm here. Thanks for noticing, Ken. Always appreciate your reviews. Lydi**