It

I say It
It as in my soul
And it makes me want
To pick out vomit from the depths of my stomach
To have some release from the buildup
Of s****y emotions and distrust
I want to vomit
Because I really wish I didn't have a soul
I wish I didn't care
I wish any fragment left of my torn
Shattered
And withered soul
Would vaporize into thin air
And find itself as droplets against
Some spring flowers in a daughters garden
I really really really wish
I didn't have a soul
Because a broken soul hurts way more than a broken heart
When you give someone your heart
You give them your hopes
Your dreams
Your fears
Your passions
But when you give someone your
Entire soul
You give them the whole definition of what you are
Everything in its entirety
All of what has built and broken you
All of what lies in the oceans
Of your secrets that you don't even know
Giving your soul
Its nearly impossible
Unless that person
Is really
And I mean really, extraordinarily, tremendously important as the key to your life
And that being said
God will grant them your being
If they're the one perhaps
But now I'm not entirely sure
And this poem is confusing myself
I can't seem to figure out
How you became so reckless as to
Slash my soul the way you do
Why wasn't my soul more precious than diamonds
You wouldnt throw your prized autographed football
From Tom Brady off into the grand canyon
So why would you do that to my soul?
Better yet, why would you do that repetively?
As if my entire existence was nothing more
Than the sigh of a child who didn't get her way
My soul is f*****g broken and you're the only person who could fix it
So why do I find us running in circles?