The Olive trees of yesteryear

a poem about olives.

 

 The Olive trees of yesteryear

 

 

Plato took shade underneath them,

 Dogs love to sleep in the afternoon sun underneath them,

 A backpacker loves to take

 photos of them.

 

Society could not exist with out them,

We could not of washed our dirty bodies with out them,

 The inside of humans could not function for such a long and healthy time

With out them.

 

We could not see in dark with out them, and with out a shadow of a doubt our food would be awful with out them.

 

The Olive trees of yesteryear!

The Olive trees of yesteryear!

The Olive trees of yesteryear!

 

 

 

Reviews

[Eldarwen]

I like the first stance, aside the "dog's" typo. The picture you paint there is quite nice and actually let's me imagine an olive tree growing over the years with the different sceneries passing by like seasons.

However, in the second stance, you completely lost me on your second line and I'm sad to say that this fact ruins the rest of the poem for me.
I might just be particularly dense when it comes to poetry but I simply do not get that line and I cannot wrap my head around what you're trying to say with it.

I do like how you tried to make the poem actually look like an olive tree though, with the repetition of the title being the trunk :)

[Scandalous]

This doesn't flow well, and it isn't one of your greatest. It is still a nice piece, but it made me wonder if you were bored and just looking for an outlet.

~ Scandalous

[LiberScriptus]

I think it's interesting how you take something as small as an olive and expand on it. I like how you set up the structure in the first stanza, although I'm a little confused as to why you chose to put a line break in "A backpacker loves to take/ photos of them" when you left the "them" tag of the previous two lines in the same line. The second stanza confused me a little. Are you referring to how the ancient Greeks used olives- is that what you mean by "society could not exist without them"- because the Greeks were arguably the foundation of modern society? Or am I going too far and am just... off? Also, the first part if tge third stanza confuses me a bit. Are we still talking about olive trees? I like how the second part, "and without a shadow of a doubt our food would be awful without them" injects a sense of humor into the poem, although I think it feels a little out of place. The three cheers at the end also throw me a bit- I feel like there's not enough of a set up to merit that kind of enthusiasm. Still, I like how you, once again, use the visual presentation of the words to enhance your poem.

[POETIC VIXEN]

awesome...title...structure....blastomatic

[Meghan]

My family owns an olive orchard in Cyprus. This poem brought back so many fond memories of my summer's there as a child. However, like others mentioned, the grammatical and spelling errors did distract from the poem.

[Miles]

For me, the constant typos were too distracting.

[heart of an angel]

i love this poem it's beautiful i enjoyed reading it , love to read more of your work

[randomhope09]

As a cook, I loved the final " our food would be awful without them," and firmly agree. While, as many have already mentioned, there are some grammatical errors, I still enjoyed reading it through. One person mentioned the second line of the second stance as being out of place. Were you referring to the oil found in many different soaps and washes cause that is how I comprehended it?

[Dunlack]

This piece puts into perspective the different variety of poets we have to deliver something special to us...Great work

[Lily Mae]

The Olive branch alone is powerful..can you even imagine the intense magic within the whole tree.. love this..xx

[NoneOfYourBusiness akaK..]

to each one of us poetry represents to our own uniqe and individual conscious and sobconscious~ the composition soars and the enchantment is vibrant~ the allure is in the mystery and significance of the olive tree~