Epilogue

this is the beginning of the second book.

Epilogue.

“I’m never going to make it… we are going to die my daughters.” I could feel the hate in the air around me as I ran, it was like a thick fog before me. I didn’t dare sneak a glance over my shoulder as the brush and branches before me whipped against my sweaty pale face, digging red welts into the flushed skin of my cheeks. Nothing else mattered at this moment than to lose the ones who pursued me before I reached the Ridge. The Ridge was a landmark well known to our land. A cluster of hills and steep falls that once crossed led to the land to which no one but the Fire-Holders were allowed to pass. And me, of course. It is what separated the glorious lands of our Nations. Tonight, it was my only salvation and hope.

A small almost unnoticeable nudge made the swell of my abdomen bulge and my hand instinctively dropped down to my stomach. Smoothing my hand under my belly, I almost smiled. I could feel the cold smooth stones beneath the broken bloodied soles of my feet as I ran head on into the darkness without hesitation. I ignored the pain as I ran and welcomed the cool feel of the stone, the way you welcome a cool glass of water when the sun beats down against your body. As the stones became more frequent I knew the Ridge was near, my face grew ashen with fear. I could not allow what I held to fall into their disgusting hands. Those dogs would die before they laid a hand on my babes.

Pressing my lips together, I whipped my head around and almost whimpered at their closeness. I could feel the heat of their foul smelling breath on the nape of my neck. Their scent filled my nostrils with their putrid scent and made my dizzy. My brows creasing with frustration, I snarled as I pushed harder against the moist ground and shot forward with a jolt of energy. A cry of pain left my rose colored lips as a stray branch caught ahold of the leather binding that held the white curly locks of my unruly hair in a ponytail, ripping it free of its tangled mess. As I ran, my curls bounced around the curves of my hips, clinging to the sweat dampened white chemise I wore loosely to fit the abnormal swell of my belly.

Leaping into the air I planted the sole of my foot against the mossy flat surface of a tree and pushed off landing within the tall thick branches of an elm tree. The silvery moon was high in the sky, surrounded by the speckles of stars scattered all over the empty vastness of the night. All around me the leaves shone an almost bright neon like green as their waxy covering reflected the pale moonlight. My breath was visible in the air before me as I panted loudly. Hoping and waiting, I listened carefully. My ears straining to hear the pounding sound of their paws in the moist cold floor of the forest.

Nothing.

Closing my eyes, I took a deep steadying breath and attempted to focus past the loud thrumming of my racing heart. Forcing the chilling air into my lungs slowly, feeling the burn as it drags against my esophagus slowly like a cold blade against the warmth of a slender neck. A choking sound leaves my lips as I think of her. My aunt. My hand slides smoothly over my swollen stomach in which my twin daughters await to be born and I can almost curse the gods aloud for what they are forcing me to do. I feel them stir within me eager, as I am, to be out of their temporary haven.

That b***h. If only I could keep you close, my little ones, but I can’t. I can’t! I must let you go if I want you to be safe. And you must live even if that means I must die.

The rhythmic pounding of paws interrupts my thoughts and instantly I snap my head up, turning to look to the north where a trio of wolves hastily runs past my trail. Heads hung low to the ground as they follow my scent, I chew on my bottom lip as I contemplate whether to leap into the next tree or if to remain unseen within my tree.

Pulling myself close to the thick trunk of the tree I watch to see if they notice where my trail ends. They don’t, running past it they allow their hate and rage to cloud their sense of smell. The edge of my lips pull up into a sneer as I sit up straight and lay my right hand against the double edge blade sword hanging from the curve of my hips. I now have an advantage on my side. They don’t know I am behind them now.

My eyes light up, changing from their deep ocean blue to a luminescent light blue-green as my fury ignites my desperate need for their blood. An animal like sound rips up the sore lining of my throat as I crouch down bending at my waist before I launch my body into the air.

Time seems to slow around me as I mumble three known words beneath my breath and; instantly, I am alone in the world. No one inhabits it but me. In this world, time doesn’t command itself. I command it. Turning my body in the air I seem like a stretching feline, arching my body into the slick curve of a wide u. I am grace incarnate. I am everything, yet nothing. In the air around me, the mist that was invisible to my eyes now hangs motionlessly in mid-air. Leaves falling from its branches are held by a million invisible strings, keeping them from their destination as I leap to the floor. Everything seems to have a light source emanating from within them. There are no shadows in this world, nothing can hide from my eyes. I crouch forward and glare at the world, my life lessons as a warrior not allowing me to feel safe even in my own haven. Fangs bared, I pull my sword from its scabbard, the ring of its steel vibrating in the air around me as I pant. Still crouching forward, my luminescent eyes scan the forest thoroughly and tiredly before deciding to give myself a moments rest. With a heavy sigh, I straighten and sheath my sword as I shrug of my pack and set it down with a heavy thud.

Lifting my hand to wipe the cool sweat from my forehead, I brush my forehand to my clammy skin and breathe deeply attempting to calm my racing heart. The numb feeling in my legs slowly begins to fade as I sway tiredly on my swollen feet, it is then that the pain hits me and I lurch forward onto my hands and knees a shrill high shriek leaving my lips.

My sight goes white with the intensity of the pain and I fall forward onto my side as my body spasms wildly upon the wet moss of the forest. It starts like a tiny prick in my abdomen and quickly elevates to a blood churning spasm that leaves me breathless and shrieking with the few air left in my lungs. I clutch at the ground as if to alleviate my own torture and jerk wildly until I feel it slowly fade.

Dear Gods!!! What was happening to me?? It felt as if I was being torn from the inside out!

Panting into the dirt as it sticks to my sweaty face, I grab my belly and wail with anguish. I can feel my daughters dying inside me as I arch my body off the floor at an angle so extreme it seems my spine will snap instantly. Blindly, I try to think past the pain, reaching around searching for my sword, I find it by my side and unsheathe it with a moan of sheer agony. Grinding my teeth, I press its cold metal to my under-belly and shriek until my voice is not heard anymore. Warmth pools around me as I lay on the floor, my ragged breath coming out in short huffs. Trembling I grab the sheet from the pack by my head and reach down, feeling around blindly as my vision begins to darken slowly. Blood is everywhere, thick coats of it all over my hips.

Above me I see the shadow-less trees and leaves go dark as my haven fails to protect me and delivers me unto the hands of my doom. I hear their howls and my blood runs cold as my strength abandons me. My arms fall uselessly to my sides and I know I have failed to keep my daughter safe. I can’t tell if my eyes are open or closed as small waves of tremors pass through my weak tattered body.

I hear their paws crushing against the floor as they come for me, the sound is like a war drum thrumming in the silence presenting your death like it is royalty. A wail leaves my lips and my hands flop aimlessly at my sides trying to protect my babes.

 

Author's Note

okay so i know its not all that good but yeah... please let me know what you like about it and dont like :D

Reviews

[gcp]

This is intriguing - lots of threat and conflict - and some great use of language - good stuff. :)

a few little odd things - "glass of water" seems a very modern phrase which jars slightly with the general old almost tribal feel of the piece - Perhaps just using 'goblet' would sit better (unless you intended this so spark curiosity for later)

There are a few slips of perspective - for example:

"My eyes light up, changing from their deep ocean blue to a luminescent light blue-green"

this jumps out of her point of view - this is an external observation of the character - and this causes a subtle disconnect from the immediacy of the narrative - you get the glow of the eyes in later much more smoothly - so perhaps this isn't even needed?

On occasion you also have sentences that are slightly ambiguous when I tihnk they don't need to be. For example:

Nothing else mattered at this moment than to lose the ones who pursued me before I reached the Ridge

Does she want to lose them before she reaches the Ridge - Or - did they pursue her before she reached the Ridge?

Obviously - it's we know from context which one you mean - but the fact that the sentence is technically unclear means that the reader has to make that judgment - but it's easy enough to switch the sentence round to remove any possible confusion -

Before I reached the Ridge, I had to lose the ones who pursued me. Nothing else mattered.

This makes the writing smoother and therefore easier to read and enjoy. (Readers are lazy)

Anyway - just thoughts - little niggles - the writing is good - the ideas are interesting - I think with a little polish this could be a winner :)

[Lovely Delights]

thank you sooo much! youre advice is very helpful and i will always look forward to your reviews from now on. its not perfect yet but hopefully ill get there!

[Lovely Delights]

oh and the glass of water was a kind of foretelling of an event that is to come and something you will learn about the character a little later on.

[gcp]

:) I'm glad it was useful :)

Sure, if the glass is there on purpose to foreshadow something in the story - then it's all good :)

[Lovely Delights]

Haha. yeah. are you a writer as well?

[gcp]

I'm working at it. Nothing published yet - but plenty written ;)

[Lovely Delights]

same here i had my story's plot finished my junior year but got caught up with college but here i am.

[Kyle Schaerffer]

moo