Toy Soldier

Oh, Toy Soldier. What a
Big world you have at your feet.
Ride down by the river, under the moonshine
To make your greatest new defeat.

Set yourself off on a new adventure.
And as for your wounds,
Our doctors will heal you with their medicine.
Since not many knew your journey would risk so much.

Your family must be so proud.
Both mom and dad.
To have a son join the army and leave his life behind.
He himself then, was all he had.

Not sure of his return,
He kissed his mother's forehead
And told his father: "Be safe."
Not aware that was lastly they would see their son's face.

As I write this,
I think of you, Toy Soldier.
As my pen glides across the paper,
I can't help but picture you getting older.

Such a tragedy, poor Toy Soldier.
And you were so brave.
Standing tall, fighting hard with the toughest troops.
Now give that flag a final wave.

I will always salute you, Toy Soldier.
And to you I say:
"Rest in peace."

Reviews

[Bertie]

I really like this :) It's a topic thats very difficult to talk about, I personally have never been brave enough to write about it, and am inspired by you way of doing it...I think by having 'Toy Soldier' you have excelled this poem from good to great; it's not simply sad, its a symbol of childhood, tortured childhood, a toy so out of place in war...It really highlights the tragic futility of the whole thing...There so much you could do with this poem! Your last three stanzas are the strongest part of the poem...Perhaps try giving the others a really cruel edit, make them more pithy or revise some of the syntax. For example, 'Our doctors will heal you with their cure.' This is a bit of an oxymoron, to be healed is to be cured, to cure is to heal, I'm not sure you need both of the words...I'd love to experiment with this, looking perhaps at rhyme or a more disciplined rhythm, only as an experiment as it may aid that sort of militaristic, trudging, seemingly never endingness of war...But these are small things of course! And I really enjoyed this :) it has intrigued and inspired me more than most of the other things I've read recently :)

[DoNt LoSe YoUrSeLf]

Thanks for this wonderful review :) I really appreciate it. And yeah, I understand I could fix some words around, I'll be sure to play around with and edit it a bit sometime. It means a lot that you're able to pick this apart and analyze it...means so much! Thank you!

[Bertie]

Let me know if you give it an edit, I'd love to have another look ! :)

[DoNt LoSe YoUrSeLf]

Alright, sounds good :) I'll prolly make some changes this weekend!