Suicide

Far off-shore in the dense dark night
a small boat's sailing forth
through storms and stars
and scattered hopes
to the Dying Lands up north.

The storm soon pass a silence fell
the small boat's sailing by
For broken dreams
and scattered hopes'
a deadly lullaby.

The Land's in sight, a calm embrace
as day makes way for night
At journey's end
can't comprehend
the darkness' radiant light.

Author's Note

I wrote the first stanza two years or so ago as a complete poem. Someone suggested recently to try and add three more stanzas, it is hard though but I want to try an see where it will lead. So far just one additional stanza.

Reviews

[quinfinn]

this is a haunting and troubling piece. for so few words, it says so many things.
the subject of suicide is deeply troubling to me and i know intimately how very
tempting it can be when desperation sets in to just end your own life. my baby sister's husband hung himself in the garage on the 4th of july weekend years ago
and i watched and helped his two little boys grow to manhood, knowing what
happened to their father. nicely written, suicide is no option...

[DOROTHY]

wow i just read this and made me think of others ending their own lives and it is so sad when they do
your poem said it all hun, well written and wonderful to read.
i so like this one

[Lourisa]

Thanks, Dorothy.

[emmajoy]

A sadness of words that should never need writing.

[KATHY SUE SILLS]

Powerful little write!

[Suchita]

Waao ..The shortest Poem i ever read...yet so beautiful...
Its really hard to express more in less words... Loved it..

[Dream Weaver]

Brief but powerful!
Nicely done Lourisa...

[Seshat Nidaba]

Very compact, I like how so much can be interpreted from a few well placed lines! How charming is giving up sometimes, that I can actually understand all sorts of good reasons for suicide.

A strong image - a brave sailor, but bravery is at odds with the title. I think of Tennyson's Ulysses and his search for experience and knowledge. He set forth with his crew to drink life to the lees, undaunted. I find that poem inspirational.

[John]

Sounds like something Hemingway could of written, except with much more heart. the title is so bold; really grabbing peoples attention, but the brevity of this is the perfect way to do the title justice. great job

[Joiedevivre]

a short piece with wast implications. Beautiful.