My Love

A Poem by Louise

I thought I loved you,

when each day was filled with you. Laughing with you. Walking with you. Exploring with you. Being with you.

The days when I thought I loved you,

I used to wait for you to call me. Wait for you to text me. I used to wait for you. I was waiting for you.

When I knew I shouldn’t love you,

I would look at you look at someone else. I would think of you in a way that I knew you would never think of me.

The day I thought I lost you,

You were there with me. Watching me. Holding me. Begging me to stay with you. It was the day you lost hope in me.

When I realised there were no love within you,

was when I looked into your eyes for the last time and saw no love. Saw nothing but your guilt filling up your tears. And there I was in peace, because I knew that it was never your love that had to fix me.

The day I loved myself,

Was when I saw you in the hallway with someone else and felt nothing. It was when I looked in the mirror and saw myself for who I was, ang not who I were. The day when I would be pleased to be with myself. With my family. With my friends. And see you for who you were.

I knew I loved myself,

when each day was filled with me. Laughing with my voice. Walking with myself. Appreciating myself. Loving me.