I Hate Poetry

A short poem about my dislike of poetry.

Everyone likes different things

This I know too well

From kicking balls to wars on stars,

I fail to see how they sell.

Poetry is one of these

hobbies I do not like.

I shall list the reasons here in poem.

I apologise for the ghastly sight.





Did you know that war is bad?

That life is dull but beautiful?

Technology is consuming us?

We should all be seen as equal?

We're being told the same old things

we've been told since we were five.

Yet we applaud these poetic people

like they're the deepest ones alive.





Some say there should be no rhymes

For that's simple child's play

While others say without a rhyme

There's no poem to be found.

Who are we to listen to?

Who are we to follow?

Or does a piece of art

Need no direction at all?


What's the grammar of a poem?

I simply have to ask.

It's proven to be the most difficult

element of this task.

Should there be a capital?

What about a full stop or a comma?

They change a lot, just like the rhyming.

I'm tired of all this drama.

There are many patterns of a poem

such as Iambic or Haiku.

Is it really necessary

like the rhyming too?

Can someone's idle rants

such as one of mine

be twisted into a poem

through the use of lines?

The final pet peeve that angers me

is when a poet demands

a new line

for so few words.

It simply has to go.

Sometimes it's used for

Emphasis

to show the worth of the words.

Other times it makes

no sense.

It's simply done

Randomly.

I detest this technique

so.



You may love poetry.

It can save your life.

It can be your sanctuary,

this causes me no strife.

But if you think it makes you smart

or wise or just unique,

then like the many football fans,

you're being a massive dick.

Author's Note

I doubt this is the greatest poem you've ever read but hopefully you'll get a chuckle out of it.

Reviews

[Frieda P]

Pretty clever writing a poem about how much you abhor poetry, I have to agree with jacob I enjoyed it till the last two lines, they fell short and it lost its momentum, blame poetry, what else? ha

[jacob erin-cilberto]

i did get more than a chuckle...i would have ended it differently....i thought the last two lines actually take away from the overall smartness of the piece, i felt it deserved more there...very clever subtle rhyme...and a really good statement of how some poets can be so pompous about how good they are...all we do as poets is write words...and the muse is mostly to blame for that...not our greatness.

[Louisa_K]

Thanks. Yeah, I don't like the last two lines either but I couldn't think of anything else to write. Thank you again.