first line fourth stanza did you mean "our ears" that is how i read it.
wow, this poem put an idea in my head....instead of building walls and keep others out, even though we are thinking we are protecting ourselves...we keep friendships from happening, allies from happening.
Whether it is in personal relationships or relationships between countries...understanding and working together is what makes things grow, blossom into what is good.
love this piece.
excuse the pun after what we just discussed, but i went swimming in this one...and held my breath.
j.
Posted 4 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
4 Years Ago
Jacob! My computer had a nightmare and disconnected when I posted my edit - this is my draft version.. read moreJacob! My computer had a nightmare and disconnected when I posted my edit - this is my draft version! Blimey... editing it again now ...
Thanks so much for pointing this out. So happy to read your thoughts too although my edited version should be much better!
Laura
I loved the complete poem. The honest and wonderful tone of the ancient writers in these words.
"After all our toils
we weep and wail for what is lost
and sentence memories to time
that time will have forgot
we look down at the rubble
cursing at the ruined waste
take the pain away and build it once again
- quick, haste!"
The above lines. I liked. Us, who love to write. We love rubble and the memory of waste. Thank you LouBelle for sharing the amazing poetry.
Coyote
Posted 4 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
4 Years Ago
We really do, especially the rubble that can be polished, stuck back together and loved again. Thank.. read moreWe really do, especially the rubble that can be polished, stuck back together and loved again. Thank you, Coyote :)
Your poem reminds me of something I've noticed about people in general . . . there are those who command & conquer, and those who go willy-nilly about their path thru life. I get the feeling your poem is saying that those who try to command & conquer will be disrupted & frustrated becuz life always throws something at us to knock down our tall towers when we think we've built something so special. But sometimes such a loss is exactly what's needed to further our growth path, even if it doesn't do much for the bottom line that used to drive everything in life (((HUGS))) Fondly, Margie
Posted 4 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
4 Years Ago
Thanks Margie, I agree with you that sometimes we need to be forced onto a different path, some fall.. read moreThanks Margie, I agree with you that sometimes we need to be forced onto a different path, some falls can be a blessing in disguise. I suppose the path of least resistance might not always be the right one. Interesting thoughts!
Laura.
This feels quite empowering to my mind. It feels like a musing on our own power and how we have the choice to assert that power rather than waiting around for something to happen that will require action.
Your idea of standing beneath a fallen tree conjures many ideas for me, but foremost in my mind is the sense that perhaps we put ourselves in precarious positions and maybe wait for the inevitable crush.
But we don’t always realize what we’re doing. Sometimes it’s only in hindsight that these things become clear.
But your poem seems to be a call for awareness and presence. Examination perhaps. And ultimately using one’s inherent power to encounter the world in meaningful way. At least this is what I am taking from the words today.
I enjoy that positivity.
Posted 4 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
4 Years Ago
Thank you so much Ellis for such a considered and thoughtful review!
It's true - eve.. read moreThank you so much Ellis for such a considered and thoughtful review!
It's true - even when the tree is fallen, we stand in familiar ground hoping that it might resurrect itself. It is empowering to realise that we have the choice to assert ourselves. But so true, also, that we can become trapped in our own minds, stifled by indecision.
I'm so pleased that you felt the positivity.
Thanks again,
Laura.
powerful title ... got my noodle humming right off :) and standing beneath a fallen tree .. challenged me ... tho fallen (for whatever reason) they can continue to shade our thoughts and feelings .. our plans, toils .. falling in love ... without a hint of ..just maybe it will come down :( like jacob, i think the walls can be two fold ... we can become complacent once things are "accomplished" ... we can learn, however, it truly is the journey that counts .. i love those closing two lines .. it we stand pining over what has been lost .. we also loose our potential future .. so clever LauraKate! love it!
E.
Posted 4 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
4 Years Ago
Thank you E! It was so lovely to read your comments. Sometimes we're too afraid to maven or walk awa.. read moreThank you E! It was so lovely to read your comments. Sometimes we're too afraid to maven or walk away even when there really is no other way. Thanks for sharing your thoughts.
Laura.
first line fourth stanza did you mean "our ears" that is how i read it.
wow, this poem put an idea in my head....instead of building walls and keep others out, even though we are thinking we are protecting ourselves...we keep friendships from happening, allies from happening.
Whether it is in personal relationships or relationships between countries...understanding and working together is what makes things grow, blossom into what is good.
love this piece.
excuse the pun after what we just discussed, but i went swimming in this one...and held my breath.
j.
Posted 4 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
4 Years Ago
Jacob! My computer had a nightmare and disconnected when I posted my edit - this is my draft version.. read moreJacob! My computer had a nightmare and disconnected when I posted my edit - this is my draft version! Blimey... editing it again now ...
Thanks so much for pointing this out. So happy to read your thoughts too although my edited version should be much better!
Laura