Just because I'm better doesn't mean it was okay

I feel guilty I got better 

I feel ashamed of my past 

it feels like every thing was made up 

just me going crazy in my head

everything seems so, so small 

like it never even happened at all

but does that mean that everything that happened is forgiven? just because I'm doing fine? 

you don't seem to care how you broke me 

time after time 

if you were ever going to care 

now is certainly not the time 

did the crime but would always lie

wasted years of my life.

time.time.time 

how it has escaped me 

I feel like I never left that house 

where you would abuse and berate me 

YOU TOOK SO MUCH FROM ME.

YOU CAN'T EVEN SEE.

HOW HORRIBLE I FELT.

HOW COULD YOU.

I WOULD JUST TRY TO CUT IT OUT.

but I guess now it doesn't matter 

since I'm better 

right? 

everything's okay? 

it doesn't matter anymore

days will just fade away

until my body is cold and surrounded by soft clay