Something is Wrong with my Angel

 

Something

has shifted in my Angel's eyes

I feel the pain he hides there

the fists he clenches

(when he thinks no one is around)

the way his lips form my name

tenderly, sweetly, that trace of regret

the fear is there

that he'll be leaving this place soon

into a vault of emptiness, a dark sky

something

is misplaced in his aura

like a shadow thrown slightly eskew

something

has made his face red, eyes watery

(and somehow, now)

more beautiful than ever before, but,

something is wrong with my Angel.

Reviews

[Wildfleour]

Very touching poem.

[bluessadmood]

oh i see something changing in the eyes watery that is sad ,thinking of leaving to a well known place ,i think we all think of death at times ,it feels fear and loneliness,as if time is closing eyes we abandon all for we are leaving ,this is sad but real and natural ,lovely write,just great...

[Jarrett]

it seems to me, in my macabre perception, that the angel fears death.
A very resonant poem that made me feel for the angel in question, as if I myself wanted to comfort his sorrows. Very well done.

[CLUTZ]

well make him feel better. you have to take care of your angel. okay I'm starting to sound really ridiculous so all i have to say is this is good and i love it.

[Dani California]

I agree with Spoken. There is "something" about your writing...
something different and alluring. It's almost seductive in a very non seductive manner. Not sure how else to say that.. can't quite place it either.

"something
is misplaced in his aura
like a shadow thrown slightly eskew.."


I love the imagery you create..
and this has a very unique flow to it.. so soft and gentle..

wonderfully penned.. :)

[Bhavya Kaushik]

Hey! This is nice, very thoughtful indeed.
Though! I found it dark too at few places and ...the ending is very strong, just perfect!
Great job.

[Adrian K. Smith]

There is an odd beauty, to be found in the humanity of one allowing themselves to feel pain. It is not your classical beauty, it is a more humane beauty. There is that trust in sharing that something is not quite right, that otherwise might disappear behind some false bravado. They hurt, but they trust you with that fact, knowing that you will not hurt them more.

[Spoken]

I like your style. Your descriptions and the way you weave your words.. can't place it but it's different and strikes a cord in me.. very enjoyable