Without you

As the ocean waves call your name

the love is gone from thy heart

I cannot go on without my love

for I have learned so

Without you all I feel is pain

Without you all I see is sadness

Without you all I know is death

You are now gone forever

I count the stars at night

Just to hope you are too

Just so remember the look in your eyes

The last time you said goodbye

I sing melodies hoping you listen

for just my voice

I hope you remember me

forever and always

I will never forget the happiness you brought me

Sent from the bird you once made fly

Reviews

[Patrick Henry]

Selfishly, I am wishing it had bigger text to see it easier, and had that space above and below to make it pop out, but I'm not picky when a poem is as adorable as this one is. There is very little reason for me to "critique" it in the sense of giving you some sort of grammar. form, and/or construction criticism because I really like to read what you have to say and HOW you say it even more!! Those last two lines of yours nailed it for me. The whole time I am reading this poem, I am thinking "Who is this girl? It's pouring rain outside, I'm tired and a bit moody, and I just want to read someone I have written to!!" Nope. You don't make it that easy for me and I should thank you for that. lol You make "moping" embarrassing!! lol Beautiful, Gabby..... xoxox -Mark