Bullying: My Story

After hearing about a brave girl named Phoebe Prince, I decided to post my story about being bullied. This is very long, but I want people to see what it is like to be a victim of bullying.

First off, I want to say that this is the hardest blog I have ever written. I am about to bring up painful childhood memories which since they last took place I have put in the back of my mind. After hearing the story of a brave young girl named Phoebe Prince, I have decided to post my story because it is time that people put a stop to bullying. Before I begin, I would like to say that my thoughts and prayers go out to the friends and family of 15 year old Phoebe Prince who committed suicide after being tremendously bullied by people at her school. I am not going to compare my story, to Phoebe's because I do not know how bad she was tortured at school. It is sad that she made the choice she made, but unless you were in her shoes, you have no right to judge her decision. Now, I will begin to share my life of hell as I was bullied throughout middle and my freshmen year of high school.

The bullying started for me when my mother gave custody of me to my cousins and I was forced to switch schools. I was a 6th grader, and had no clue that me having to switch schools was going to lead to the next four years of my life being a complete hell. I was a shy kid, and I had trouble making friends. I guess this was the result of constantly changing schools due to issues with my birth mother. Anyway, I had been okay and had friends but things would change for me when I first walked into the doors of McKell Middle School.

In 6th grade I joined McKell halfway through the school year.I had no clue about the pain I would soon go through. Now, I had trouble making friends so I became friends with people who the preps at McKell would pick on. This, I believe was one reason I would soon be bullied. I will not mention names of any of the bullies as I have moved on and even became friends with a few of them. As I progressed through my 6th grade year, I had emotional issues because I was separated from my mother. Honestly, I had issues with personal hygiene as well. My life was torn apart and I guess looking back on it I was a bulls eye for all the bullies at McKell. The bullying in 6th grade mostly occurred in the schools gym. This would be the location of my first and last real fight. A kid in my school was involved in a ATV wreck and some of the people who were picking on me told that kids good friend that I said I hope he would die. I stand by my word that was not the case. The kids friend approached me and started to shove me. I shoved back and from there my first fight began. I basically got my a*s kicked, and I think it was at that point that any hope I had of being able to stand up for myself was lost. Me and that guy would become friends later in high school and I hope if he sees this that he knows that I never said anything about his friend. After getting my butt kicked in a fight I further widened the bulls-eye on my back because the other bullies knew I was weaker then them. This incident would basically be the last time I'd take up for myself until my freshmen year of high school.

Now 7th and 8th grade were basically the same for me. I'd be hit, called names, and would have kids draw pictures of me living in a dumpster. Going to the bathroom was always a fear I had because in the restrooms there was no teachers to save me and of course sometimes I ran into bully's in the restrooms. I had no safe refuge in middle school and everywhere I went I'd get picked on by someone. Some teachers would not show up to class on time and while we were in class without teacher supervision I would be hit, spat on, and made fun of. Some classes were better then others. I would soon learn that most of the kids who picked on me were destined to make nothing of themselves and the kids who were nice to me were often the brightest the school had. This would lead to a wise choice I made in high school but I will comment on that later. Like I mentioned earlier, gym class would often be a source of hell for me. I would often be hit in the locker room, and people would take what little money I had. Often, if I gave them money they would leave me alone for that day but the next day they would be right back at it. There were times when I would have 3 or 4 guys who would corner me in the locker room and hit me until I was in the floor. Then they would leave like nothing happened at all. I did make a wise choice in middle school and joined the football team. I would make some strong friendships with people who would take up for me.

While a lot of my torture was received in the classrooms at McKell Middle, I had to suffer every day on the bus. Here, I would constantly be hit by flying pencils, or whatever else they would chose to throw at me. I dreaded that bus ride because as soon as the bus pulled up, I knew it was time to suffer. There were basically a few kids on the bus who were responsible for my hell. The bus driver at the time would do nothing about it. It was horrible having to always look around to see if one of the bullies would be preparing to toss something my way.

In middle school, I developed migraine headaches. I am not sure if they were due to the torture I received or because of my eye problems, nonetheless these headaches would sometimes prove to be my savior. If my mirgaine was bad enough, I would be allowed to stay home which meant no spending the day being bullied. The torture at school would become so bad that I would start faking some of the migraines just to be able to go a day without being bullied. I think I actually became a bit of a expert at faking those headaches. I had to, because it was the only thing that could save me from hell.

The day I left McKell Middle to go to Greenup County High School, was the day I thought I'd finally be free of bullying. Unfortunately, I was sadly mistaken.

Now I have spoke of the bus rides in middle school, but that was just a appetizer for the hell I would go through on a high school bus. For people who are not familiar with where I went to school I will try and make this brief. I went to a county school which meant I had a 30 minute bus trip to the middle school, where I would spend 30 minutes waiting for a bus to take me the other 20 minutes to the high school. I would spend almost a hour and a half being tortured outside of school, twice a day. Before and after school, made no difference. On the bus, I'd be hit with paper airplanes that were lit on fire (No Joke), pencils, pens, batteries, and soda bottles. While we waiting at the middle school, I'd be punched, kicked, made fun of, and mentally tortured. I feared for my life, and this is something that no one should have to endure. Basically, in between buses we had no adult supervision, something I think McKell finally corrected.

My freshmen year of high school would prove to be my breaking point. The same people who bullied me from McKell continued to bully me in high school. I can say that the kids from Wurtland let me be, which I am very thankful for. I had wised up to the bullys and developed strategies which I would use against them. If someone were to pick on me in class while the teacher was late, I would learn to wait outside for the teacher and then enter the classroom. In between classes I would avoid the hallways which I knew a bully would be in. Sometimes this meant that I would walk upstairs and go back down the other stairs just to avoid being pushed into a locker. I always made sure to keep myself in the eyes of a teacher because they were my only hope. Sadly, in some classes I would be tortured while they sat there and did nothing. I quit football and joined cross country in high school which did not help much with making any friends as we had only 3 people on the team. However, I remained friends with the players from McKell and some of them would often take up for me which was good because I sure did not take up for myself.

Towards the end of my freshmen year I had had enough of giving my money to bullies, just to go a few hours without being tortured. I also was tired of being pushed, kicked, hit, and made fun of on a daily basis. One class was so bad that I would often ask to go to the library because I was safe there. I used the excuse that I wanted to research colleges and sometimes I did that but most of the time it was just my way of escaping hell. I had had enough of a particluar group of bullies and did something I never wanted to do. I confronted my high school counselor about trying to get out of a class. When I explained my reason, she seemed upset. I told her that I had reached my breaking point and that I had two choices. One, I change classes; or two, I take them all on and go down swinging. I told her I was serious and that I would do whatever it takes to defend myself against them. I said if I had to use chairs or whatever I could find to fight them that I would. I think my words to her upset her and she knew I was on the verge of exploding. She confronted a few of my teachers and they did the best they could to prevent the kids from bullying me. It still happened sometimes, but no where near as bad or as often.

I mentioned earlier about the smart kids being the kids that never bothered me. It was this reason that I began constantly taking honors or advanced classes because I knew the bullies would never be enrolled in those classes. This turned out to be a good thing for me because I was never bullied in those classes and I'm sure I got a better education out of it. It is hard for anyone to learn in classrooms that are out of control and one is constantly being picked on.

As far as I can recall through my years of being bullied, I never once thought about committing suicide but there were days when I begged the Lord to end my life so I would no longer have to suffer. I always knew there would be a light at the end of the tunnel and I was in a battle every day to make it to the light. Suicide was a permanent solution to a temporary problem, and I'm glad I never made that choice to end it all.

I would like to say that being bullied those four years made me much stronger emotionally. I never let words hurt me, and I now take up for myself. Thankfully I am in college where people are more mature and no one really seems to bother anyone. I doubt that this is the class for every college student as I'm sure bullying does occur in college it is just I have not witnessed it. I enjoy college and I guess being around students who are actually trying to make something of themselves takes away any urge to bully, unlike in middle and high school where people are forced to attend school.

It is my hope that my story will give others the insight about what a victim of bullying goes through. It is also my hope, that others will do there best to help stomp out bullying. There is so much we can do to help make a kids life in school much better. We can not just stand by and hope that the schools administration will take care of it, because more times then not they have their back turned away from the problem. We can even save lives by working together to fight back against bullying. I hate hearing about kids who just can not endure anymore and make the ultimate choice to end their life. It is so sad, and yet it is 100 percent preventable.

What can we do? First, if you are someone who is or knows someone who is being bullied, you need to speak up as I did. If you remain silent, the problem will continue and it will get worse. You need to tell your parents, or school counselors. You are not being a rat by telling on someone who is bullying you or someone else. You may actually save a life by speaking up for someone who is being bullied. I can not promise you that it will get any better but it is my hope that there are some school officials who really do have a concern for the well being of their students. Parents, if your child says he or she is being bullied, please do everything you can to help your kid. Trust them, because it takes a lot of courage for a kid to tell their parents about their treatment at school. I did not mention this to my family, and if I had then maybe my torture would not have lasted as long. There are other things you can do to prevent bullying. Start a club at school dedicated to stop bullying. Surround yourself with others who will have your back as you have theirs. Contact school officials and ask about their policies towards bullying. Some schools actually have no policies in regards to bullying. If your school is one of those, work to get a policie enforced. Also, if your school does have one, then do everything you can to strengthen the policies.

We can all work together to stop this horrific event that occurs each day at just about every school. Parents, talk to your kids about this. Odds are they know someone who is being bullied and this might be that victims only way of getting help. Kids, talk with other kids and help get the word out about bullies at your school. The more information someone has, the more they are able to deal with and hopefully one day defeat bullying for good. I hope that we never have to see another story like the one Pheobe shared with us. We can not let that girls death be in vein.

Please check out this website today!

http://www.phoebeslaw.com/

Rest in Peace Phoebe Nora Mary Prince (1994-2010)

-Kyle

Author's Note

I wrote this last night for Blogspot after hearing the story of Phoebe Prince. I know I made some grammar mistakes, but honesty that is not why I wrote this.

Reviews

[LisetteCanWrite!]

This was an incredibly touching written story. I think everyone can relate to being bullied but as you have depicted here some REALLY get targeted and even with skills bullying can be a hard thing to stomp out. Honestly it takes as many to get on board working together as possible to stop the issue in each and every school and EVEN community.

It's even sadder to see a child get swarmed and people pass by or watch without saying a word or doing anything sometimes in fear of involvement. In workplaces we encounter gossip but that level of bullying does not exist as harsh and if we as adults can go to work safe.. shouldn't children have that same standard of safety????

[Ashley.M.E]

Phoebe Nora Mary Prince is the same age as me… or would have been and I enjoyed... well not enjoyed but was glad that I have read this story. I have been picked on still kindergarten starting with a boy who had a crush on me...and then to girls. Unlike you mine were never actual fights, but I sometimes wish they had been... I am still not very liked and I only ever been to 2 schools moving from one in 2nd grade and staying in the same school system since then. I honest am not much for kids... I don't believe I am one and judge people by actions, I am not strong enough to take my life... thought I have thought of it.

I remember being in 6th grade and having the teachers take me into the hall way and tall me I stunk… Having kids make fun of you is enough, but when a teacher… two teachers tell you, you stink there is something wrong… and all because some of the kids complained just to be… well rude. I understand how you feel, people hate those who are different… I can’t stand a lot of people, though I am nice to well everyone. The best thing you can do is ignore, and that is the hardest part…

I wouldn’t even call is bulling anymore, honestly it is just pity, everyone who bullies has something they hid, honestly if you just close your mouth and listen you would figure out what they were so mad about… usually has to do with there own insecurities.

This is well writen as well xD