Note to Self:

Sometimes you got to be legit in reflection.

 

Hey,

Wear that rage, scumbag. In the bitter truth you had it all. Every last ounce of it. Down in the vestal fields, where the population carries out its perdition, you sat in the gardens starting fires. Eyes gleaming at the bean pole parade, churning your mocking laughter. You turned, and laughed at the growing things abound, as if supreme fore-seer of apocalyptic truths. “Your Vain, in vain, so vain…” Spitting out loud, summoning bile dawned wit. Certainly there is some thread. Crank comedy cases of boring s**t—mixing measures of consistent drips. Of course your pyre found the neighboring gardens, as yours had smoldered long ago. Where did your ashes sweep you forgetful thing? Your prophecy had been drawn

 ……and you count it as proof?

Such a scientist.

Damn Jesus of light is you.

Envy is a deadly game friend. Your striping to nothing, gave nothing, took everything, as if you didn’t know. Spare your-self the scumbag.

To now…

Stumble lightly, friend, around the missing things that grow.

 

PS: And pick up milk. Were out.

Reviews

[NightDream]

Interesting way to give yourself hell for being a egocentric negative minded baboon. Nice flow and images throughout. The little reminder for milk at the end was an imaginative and unexpected bit that truely added to the whole piece.
One question?? You wrote.................
"Every last once of it" is that Ounce?

[Jerrica Benton]

you have inspired me - i was not aware that i could get away with this form in poetry!

oh. and i liked yr last line as well.

[Dani California]

hmm..lol Interesting self talk...
I'm thinking it's better to have more positive self talks..
but I guess getting down to the hard cold truth first
is good -- that way one knows what to address --

I loved the last line... lol. Yeah, that really brought the
entire piece together quite well.. :)

Great job!

[Silent Kim aka mizmetap..]

A bit hard on yourself. Must deserve it. Creative write, and loved the light tone at the end.

This is an interesting way to evaluate yourself, I guess as a writer it's the best way, you can go over it and over it and edit the write as you modify your behavior, if you so choose.

Nice work.

[BrightEyes]

ok I had to laugh at the end. first at the unexpected PS at the end and second; it made me wonder if you didn't sit down to jot a note to buy milk and wind up with this piece lol. a harsh but certainly interesting introspective piece.

[Logan Carryall]

Yes, I did mean ounce. Damn. Thank you both!!

[Cassandra]

Now you f***ed up ;)
Not with this piece. But those are the words that echo in my head reading this. I often feel as if I suck. Caught up in our own s**t such that we ignore whats plainly in front of us and everyone else. Good visuals throughout this piece.. took me a few reads.. enjoyed it tho.

also questioning the same thing as nightdream.. ounce or once...?