Why Do I?

Why do I hate him so?

I hate the way he smiles.

I hate the way he stared into my eyes.

I hate the way he wiped my tears away. 

I hate the way I used to fit perfectly in his arms.

I hate the way he kissed my forehead.

I hate the way he was always right.

I hate the way he smelled not like cologne but like a man.

I hate the way he cooked better than me,

And I hate the way he knew that.

I hate the way he wrote me funny notes while I was sleeping.

I hate the way he did things for me that I didn't ask him to do.

I hate the way he drives better than I do,

I hate the way he pays his bills on time, and I don't.

I hate the fact that he has the best family.

I hate the way his dad is more like a dad to me than my father was.

I hate the way his mom hugged me,

And I hate the way she called me "the daughter she never had".

I hate the way he picked arguments with me about nothing,

And I hate the way he told me it was because I had a cute "arguing face".

I hate the way he would be a great dad,

And I hate the way I can picture him coaching little league.

I hate the way he reads all the time,

And I hate the way he reminded me how much I love to read.

I hate how he is brilliant, at everything,

And I hate how creative he is.

I hate his passion for music,

And I hate the way it spilled into me.

I hate the way he told me the truth, even when it hurt.

I hate the way he called me baby.

And I hate the way his voice made me calm.

I hate the way he would tell me things would work out,

And I hate the way they always did just as he said they would.

I hate the way he put me first-even before himself.

I hate the way we talked for hours.

I hate the way he became my best friend.

I hate the way he held me when we slept,

And I hate the way he laughed when he was sleepy.

I hate how beautiful his hands were-even though they were rough.

I hate how he is such a hard worker,

And I hate the way we share the same values.

I hate the way when he is excited his eyes grow like a three year old,

I hate the way he seems to be one of a kind.

I hate the way he is perfect,

And I hate the way I loved him-

But most of all, I hate the way I'm scared

that I may never find

someone I hate as much as him.

Reviews

[~angelalala~]

wow very creative & intriguing. it seems you are trying to convince yourself of these things. reminds me of the way i feel about my ex husband. "I hate the way he is perfect, And I hate the way I loved him- But most of all, I hate the way I'm scared that I may never find someone I hate as much as him." my favorite lines. this is an amazing piece.

[Girlintheworld]

Nice one. I bet writing this was a true release of feelings you needed to get out. I hope you find another that you errrr hate just as much but love even more.

[*SacredWriter*]

Awww!(I literally said that after I finished reading!)
This is a very beautiful poem full of a lot of emotion!
I can really relate to it because used to love someone I hated to love
cuz it was impossible to be together and I used to be scared that I
would never find another him. The last lines are the most beautiful!
"And I hate the way I loved him-
But most of all, I hate the way I'm scared
that I may never find
someone I hate as much as him."

[Sammie]

I really love this poem.
I hate how I can feel these emotions, because.. I know you well enough to know who this is about, and how true it is.
I feel as though you're hurting.

I love you, Lolo. This is one of your BEST poems. I just hate you had to be upset to write it.

[Jade Mayhew]

I absolutely loved this poem. I think you did an amazing job.

Not to mention, the repetition was really clever. Intentionally or not, for me, the repetition caused me to repeat to myself while I was reading it, "She hates him, she hates everything about him, but she still loves him." This made me think of my ex-boyfriend. You covered all the bases to as to why a girl would hate her (then) ex after a break up.

Amazing, amazing, absolutely incredible job!!! :]

[Ocean Orchid]

I agree .... This is an awesome poem.

[Brianna Brie]

And I hate how creative he is.
I hate his passion for music,
And I hate the way it spilled into me.

This is an awesome poem. It is like when somebody asks, "Why do you love me?". You have covered all the bases. What you probably are really hating is that it is over. Kudos in love and hate!

[Twilight]

In most ways, it seems as if the woman wished that she had never met this lover in the first place! Then again, it may well be a representation for how she views an ideal lover's characteristics in general? That is more likely, I think. Also, it seems as if the woman regrets knowing or wanting this man. Or having been in a relationship with him. But is that because she can't have him anymore? Perhaps this is because there is no perfect partner out there? Possibly not for anybody.

She even resents how his love for music, "spilled into me". But why? Could this be a subtle way of expressing the need to feel sufficiently different to her partner, without being dominated by his tastes or qualities? Indeed, the protagonist raises other objections regarding this lover's many different qualities. But I repeat, it is only a representation (presumably!). Thus, none of this poem may be based on the writer's real-life experiences. I believe it would be presumptious (and probably patronising as well), to simply assume that she is expressing some kind of personal problem with finding an ideal lover! Lastly, I have just wondered if she might be making some kind of attack on how perfect a man can sometimes seem on the surface? Or how perfect he might think he is? In other words, his vanity? The answers to all of my questions, rest with the writer of this thoughtful poem.....

[Milton Donald]

This feels like a letter from your head to your heart...very raw and very beautiful. The ending has the ribbon and gave the entire poem its beauty and purpose. Amazing write.

[Delilah Dunn]

This piece is WONDERFUL. As usual...
You use imagery that evokes a clear picture of the concrete images in your head that endeared you to this man. The way you interchange love and hate due to the circumstances is honest and real. The raw emotion of this piece makes it riveting. Thank you for sharing the great read.