{desert.log.entry_14}

i'm fine

i don't want to smile anymore. 

i wish someone to take my hand.

i'm tired of walking. searching. 

carrying burdens through the sand.

i guess it is my fault. 

my vice. 

how naturally it is. 

to be nice.

but it's getting heavy. 

everyone one else's pain. 

always playing this game.

 am i going insane?

oh wait.. it's my turn. 

once more. once again...

can someone roll the dice for me.

the end.

Reviews

[emmajoygreen]

Tragically that awful oppression happens. Times when other's sadness drown one's own. Worry's walls trap feelings, life becomes worse than it need be. Your poem cries for understanding, near begging for time for yourself - now and again. You have written sadly but.. finely. Perhaps say less to others, even the occasional 'another time. be patient, please'. Tis allowed.

[living lavender]

i am guilty of not taking any days off. for me.
or forgetting how to say no. maybe next time.
{thank you for reading. for understanding.}

[emmajoygreen]

Many feel the same, know I do occasionally. But you for sure, need time to switch off sometimes.. and that way, find time to ease your stress but - in time, be able to help people when you're able. Take care, keep safe and find time to smile at your generous spirit, living lavender!

[Chris]

so many hear,
so few listen -
often tisn't the "what" that was said
but the "how" a person said it.

Chris

[living lavender]

{i appreciate your words. thank you.}

[Chris Shaw]

I felt weighted down by heaviness here. To help others, you need to also take good care of yourself. A lesson worth remembering poet.

Chris

[living lavender]

thank you for checking in.
at the time this was written. it was dark.
life was really heavy.
but now i am better. doing well. comfortable enough to share my words.
{maybe someone else may feel the same. who knows.}

[Kane Hagwood]

Being so busy helping others that we forget to help ourselves is a theme I'm not unfamiliar with. Wanting the best for others, but forgetting to ask for the best for ourselves. You have such a big heart, but when it comes to "your turn" you feel as if it isn't even your right to roll your own dice. I love this, even if it makes me a little sad. It's so pure and true at heart, putting it's emotions on its sleeves.

You deserve the best dice rolls possible for life. And isn't it funny when we witness chance acknowledge our desire?

Although you mentioned "i'm fine", know I'm just a holler away if you need to talk about anything.

Thank you for sharing this, even if it came from a heavy heart :)

[living lavender]

i appreciate you more than you know. thank you for checking in.
this was written in the somber past. {not this week.} i thought the dice part would be more subtle. but i love how you grasped it right away.
being so tired due to being there for everyone else. you can't even roll your own dice when your turn comes. bled dry.
{i appreciate your feedback. always.}