When I Close My Eyes

Every time I close my eyes

your voice is all I hear,

feeling your lips upon my neck 

fingertips across my ear. 

Our hearts beat as one 

with our hair entwined,

your skin soft as silk 

your chest on mine. 

Every time I close my eyes 

I feel my abs constrict,

feeling your nails dig in my back

you made me this addict. 

With your legs around my waist

I close my sweaty eyes,

and when they open, you are not there

cause we said our last goodbyes.

 

Author's Note

Not the best piece, didn't turn out the way I wanted.

Reviews

[Coyote Poetry]

Poem is good. Purpose and reason was stated in the poem. The story brought the reader in and ending was sad and lonely. Those dreams leave us wishing and hoping. A excellent poem.
Coyote

[Jeff Brown]

I get the effect you were going for. If you don't think it's what you want, edit!

I get the feel of this. If I am thinking like you are, I would suggest to rework the last stanza, maybe add one more..... but still very good.